Connection In The Loudest Places: Exploring The Complexity Of Our Emotional Landscape While Grieving

Episode 12: Connection In The Loudest Places

In this episode, I’m sharing something deeply personal and a little unexpected. After taking a short break from the podcast, I reflect on a season that brought both grief and celebration, and how those two experiences intertwined in a way I never could have planned.

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Episode Details

Summary

In this episode, I’m sharing something deeply personal and a little unexpected. After taking a short break from the podcast, I reflect on a season that brought both grief and celebration, and how those two experiences intertwined in a way I never could have planned.

I talk about returning to something that has long connected me to my dad, watching the Seattle Seahawks. What began years ago as a way to feel closer to him has grown into something entirely my own. This first football season without him was emotional and tender, yet it became filled with moments of joy, connection, and even celebration in ways that surprised me.

Through this experience, I realized something important about myself. Sometimes the places where we feel most aligned, most intuitive, and most ourselves are not the places we would have expected. Spiritual connection and joy do not always look quiet or serene. Sometimes they show up in loud stadiums, in shared rituals, and in collective celebration.

This episode is an invitation to let your life surprise you. The things that light you up might not fit into the story you once imagined for yourself. And that is more than okay.

This episode is for you if…

• You're navigating a grief journey and want support with how to integrate your grief

• You're deepening your emotional landscape and experiencing the complexity of feeling multiple emotions at once

• You’re interesting in exploring your intuitive gifts

• You want to bring more magic into your life and explore your spirituality

• You want to explore the idea of connecting to loved ones who’ve passed using signs

Related Episodes

• Where Intuition Meets The In-Between - Using Tarot As A Tool For Self-Discovery

• Inviting Magic Into The Everyday - How To Bring More Presence And Joy Into Your Day

• Clarity Over Certainty - Integrating Grief And Moving Forward With Intention Without Needing To See The Entire Path

• When Life Pulls You Toward A New Shore - Beginning Again And Exploring The In-Between Space After An Unexpected Life Transition

• Episode Transcript

  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Welcome to today's episode. I unexpectedly took a break from podcasting for a couple of weeks, but I'm so happy to be back, and I'm really glad that you're here. Today, I want to share something that's really personal to me, that it's something that I keep pretty close to me. And if you know me personally, you might know this about me. And if you don't, then you might have no idea. But I promise it'll all make sense when I share. So let's go ahead and get into it. But what I want to share with you kind of has to do with what I've been up to the last few weeks. So about mid-January, my mom came to visit, and she stayed through the beginning of February to celebrate the one-year anniversary of my dad's passing. Right after that, my mom flew home, and my sister and I went on a trip. And then I came back and got sick. And here we are. Now I'm feeling better. I'm recording and just happy to be here with you. So what I want to share with you today is an interesting kind of revelation I had about myself. So if you know me personally, you already know this about me, but I am a pretty big American football fan. So my family has watched the Seattle Seahawks for a long time. My dad was a season ticket holder pretty much from the beginning, and it's something that helped me feel really connected with him when he was alive, and it's something that helps me feel really connected to him now that he's gone. So I originally got into watching football, because I wanted to kind of have something to talk to my dad about, and I wanted to feel closer to him, and I started going to games with him back in, I want to say 2010 or 2011, and over the years, it's something that just has become my own interest, and not just something that I kind of did for my dad. When I moved to Seattle in 2014, it was one of the big things that helped me feel like I belonged, or that I, that Seattle was home for me. I think there was just this really amazing feeling that I had every time I would go to the stadium, and it was this automatic connection point. Like, I could see strangers wearing jerseys, wearing Seahawks gear, and immediately feel connected, and feel like, oh my gosh, like, I enjoy that, too, and it helped me feel rooted in a brand new city. It's also something that really has brought our family together. We would go to a couple of games as a family, and it just became this kind of almost ritual for us to do together, and it was a really nice way, and like a reason for my parents to visit, and yeah, it just became kind of this really core part of our identity as a family. I have so many great memories of going to games with my family, celebrating when our team won, and it's just been something that's really positive in my life. And when my dad passed away last year, I wasn't really sure how I was going to feel and how I would move forward once football season kind of came around. And when football season started, it had been about seven months since my dad passed, and I was still pretty deep in grief, and I knew that it was going to be really emotional to go back to the stadium for the first time, to kind of watch the Seahawks. And I just, I wasn't really sure how it was going to go, but I knew that I needed to take that difficult step forward. So for the first home game of the season, my mom came to visit, and we went as a family, and I really didn't watch much of the game. I was pretty emotional. There were a lot of tears, and it felt like there were just all these reminders everywhere of these experiences I had with my dad, of his presence and his influence in my life. And it was really difficult. But as the season progressed, the constant reminders, the feeling of his presence, that energy became less something that triggered an emotional response and more something that felt really comforting. And in this first season without my dad, the team itself, the Seahawks weren't really expected to do much. There's, we have a new coach. It was kind of, the expectation was that it would be like more of a building year. But as the season progressed, they started winning and, you know, overcoming challenges, and it became like more and more exciting. So then when the regular season ended, and they went to the playoffs, there were more games to go to. We got to go to two playoff games here in Seattle, and that's partially why my mom came down to visit. And we got to go to those games and just create new memories and honor kind of this gift that my dad gave us of like this, something that just will always bring us together. And something that always keeps us connected. And I remember that first playoff game, one of the ushers in the section that my dad's seats were in. She came up to my mom and myself, and she, at the beginning of the season, we had made little stickers with my dad's face on it. And she flipped her badge around and showed us like the sticker we had given her. And she was like, your dad has been here, you know, with us all season. And it just felt so impactful to have this person that I don't really know, but I've seen before at games, like kind of express the impact that my dad had on her life just by showing up and doing something that he enjoyed. And what was really interesting is that as the stakes became higher, as the team advanced through the playoffs, I could just feel more and more of my dad's presence. It felt like there was going to be this beautiful full circle moment, and then the Seahawks won the NFC Championship, which meant that they were going to the Super Bowl. And by chance, we, my family, kind of got the opportunity to purchase tickets to go to the Super Bowl, and my sister and I got to actually go to the Super Bowl and watch the Seahawks win in person. And it just felt like the most magical gift from my dad. Like, I just felt his presence so deeply. And the Super Bowl actually took place, like, four days after the anniversary of his passing. And it just felt like this beautiful gift of, like, I don't want you to be sad. I want you to feel joy as you move forward and to know I'm always with you. And on the actual anniversary of my dad's passing, my mom and my sister and I gathered together, and we just had, like, a moment to ourselves. And in that moment, I silently just asked my dad, like, hey, I love when you send me signs. Like, keep sending me signs, like, aligned numbers, like animals, whatever it is, just keep letting me know that you are around. And I saw so many signs leading up to my trip to the Super Bowl, and so many signs on that trip. I actually started just keeping a list on my phone because it was so wild. I saw aligned numbers everywhere. Like, I usually see a lot of aligned numbers just in general because I kind of like to look for them, but they were just like everywhere and so obvious. And it was just the most positive, joyful, emotionally cathartic experience. And it just felt like this really important milestone that the Seahawks won and this beautiful celebration of moving forward and carrying this grief of losing my dad in a new way. And yeah, it was just a really beautiful experience. So there's that kind of the grief portion and the closing of this transitional chapter of the year of firsts, of the first time doing all these things without this really important person present. And the other side of this is I realized after I got back from the Super Bowl trip, I realized something about myself. As I've mentioned before, I'm working with a leadership coach to help me kind of step into this next phase of my life and to help me really grow and evolve into the leader and the person I want to become. And we've been talking a lot about like energy and essence and these inherent qualities that each kind of unique individual possesses. And I realized that I am the purest person and the purest, highest version of myself when I'm a Seahawks fan. And this is just something that's actually like really unexpected for me. I never thought that like intuition work and kind of like woo-woo energetics would really ever go together with like American football and the NFL. But for me, it does. And that's when I'm in my most aligned energy. I'm really open to receiving signs. I'm like connecting with loved ones who are no longer in the physical realm. I feel overflowing with joy. I'm a lot more open to connection and connecting with strangers. And I just feel really, really light. And like the most embodied version of myself. And once I realized that, at first I kind of had to like pause and be like, is that true? Like being an NFL football fan is what brings me into like my most aligned energy. Like that's not the story that I would have written for myself, but it's something that really holds true for me. And what's most interesting is that my kind of dedication and my passion for watching football and supporting the Seahawks has only grown since losing my dad. I thought that maybe there was a chance I would like disengage or become disinterested, but my passion has only grown stronger. And I've been trying to find more ways to feel joy and connect. At the end of last season, my sister and I started making bracelets in team colors with players' names and sayings and handing them out at games. And it's this really beautiful way to connect with people and a really amazing way to spread unexpected joy, to see someone's excitement and delight and surprise when we offer something that we've made with our hands is just such a special feeling. It just makes me so happy. And yeah, I don't really know quite how to express it, but I just feel like there's something that there's just something about feeling united to support a common thing, whether it's a sports team or a cause or a community project, whatever it is, it's so important to find that connection and to find those arenas where we can feel the most ourselves and like the best version of ourselves. And I think the lesson here really is that it can happen in the most unexpected ways. And sometimes our mind likes to kind of create a very narrow path for us. And if you can open yourself up, you might actually already have what it is you're looking for. I always thought that being spiritual, being intuitive had to look a very specific way. It looked like long meditations and, you know, being out in nature and doing yoga and kind of these very cliché practices. And while that may be true for others, for me, it looks a little bit different, and that's okay. I still love being out in nature and journaling and being in the quiet. That's a really beautiful way for me to turn inward and connect to my own wisdom and connect to my intuition. And it's available to me in other ways as well, and in really unexpected ways, at a loud, noisy stadium with crazy, like, sports fanatics. That's not how I really saw it, but that's how it is. And that's actually pretty cool. And I think it also shows that our stories are all so unique, and it's important to let life surprise us a little. I think having a guiding light, having a North Star, having your values and commitments and goals are really important. And leave room to let the universe fill in the blanks a little bit for you. And these very human things can also bring us deeper connection to our spirituality or to our wisdom or to the universe. It all works together. So there you have it. I'm admitting to you that I watch football, and I'm super passionate about it, and I'm a huge Seahawks fan. I get pretty loud at games, which is something that really surprised me about myself. I just didn't imagine that ever being part of my personality, but it is. And it's really cool to have this team, this thing that I can hold on to, that brings me so close to my dad. And also, it just feels really special that the team is doing well, and they won the Super Bowl, and that this first season without my dad was so exciting and surprising and delightful. It felt like this is the best case scenario, right? Like there is something to celebrate and to honor him. And to be honest, I was really sad when the season finally came to a close, and all of the celebrations kind of were winding down. And I was like, I don't know what, where do we go from here? It's a long time until the season starts again. But I think that the timing is really good. It gives me space to digest and process and reflect. And then we get to do it all over again. So that's kind of what I've been up to on a personal level. And I just wanted to kind of come here and share with you and it feels a little scary to reveal more of the personal details. But I'm hoping that it lands well with you and that you're interested in what I'm sharing. And I'm excited to be back in this space and to keep creating and sharing with you. And yeah, that's what I have to share today. And before we close, I do have a request. My request is that, if you enjoy listening to this podcast, could you share your favorite episode with someone you know who might also enjoy it? This does two things. It really creates an opportunity for connection. You know, like what I said before, like it's a really great thing to be able to connect through a common theme or interest. So sharing an episode that you enjoy might foster an unexpected connection for you. And, you know, if everyone who's listening shares it with just one person who they know and they start listening, that doubles the reach, doubles the audience, you know, starts to really build this community and this space, which I think would be really lovely. So that's my request. If you are enjoying listening, sharing one episode that you particularly enjoyed with someone in your life who might also enjoy it. And if you're feeling stuck in the foggy middle or exhausted from having to always figure it out alone, know that I am always here for you. You can always book a clarity reading with me. And if you listen to the last episode where I did kind of a general clarity tarot spread on here, then you'll get like a better idea of what that clarity reading might look like for you. So if you want more information about that, or you want to schedule a time to meet with me, you can go to my website, www.kimkogani.com. And that's all I have for you today. I hope you take good care while the waves carry you closer, and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to today's episode. If you're new here, I'm so happy that you made your way to The Shoreline, and if you're returning, welcome back. So the last couple of weeks, I've been talking about being in kind of a time of completion. Last week, I spoke about being in a season of refinement, and today, I just want to continue the conversation. So I've been spending my time really just closing this chapter and letting go of all of the things I need to let go of, and really just kind of refining and focusing my energy. I feel like I'm kind of moving out of this really deep portal of transformation that grief gifted me and kind of shedding that and moving into what's next. I remember last year around like June, July, I started working with a leadership coach, and I remember our first discovery call, and we talked about grief and where I was at and kind of what the journey ahead might be like. And part of it was that grief really has this potential to be a powerful tool for transformation. If you really lean into it and accept it and allow it to really shape you. And so throughout that call, we kind of touched on where I was at, where I wanted to go, and how I really wanted to go through this experience and really kind of let the grief shape me as difficult as it can be. I really was up for that challenge, and I really wanted to go through that experience. So I started working with this leadership coach last summer, and this last week, we had our final session together. And what I really love about coaching is there's so much, where there can be so much intentionality around it. And I really felt like it was important to spend a session just closing the container, wrapping everything up, getting all of the loose ends out, and giving myself that ability to close the chapter and move forward. And that's not to say there aren't continuing themes or, I'm still evolving and still growing. But I wanted to just really put a pin or just complete that chapter, that container, that part of my experience. So we spent our closing session together, and I reflected on kind of where I was at, at the beginning of my journey and our work together, and kind of where I'm at now. And it's really interesting to kind of think about grief in, I feel like I see it differently now. When I first spoke with my coach, I was really, it was only a few months after my dad had passed. And it was just, some days were, it was just hard to like get out of bed and to just exist. And I felt like I was in this period of like deep devastation and feeling untethered, like I'd lost my anchor. And now I feel like I understand grief on a deeper level. And I thought that, you know, at the beginning of this journey, I really, my goal was to simply feel better. I just wanted to feel better and kind of get back to quote unquote normal. And you know, when someone you care about passes away, it creates a very distinct before and after. And I know now there is not going back to normal to what my life was like before. Instead, I feel like I've really integrated grief as part of who I am. It's not something that is happening to me anymore. It's just something that I carry with me, and it's a deep part of who I am as a person now. And you know, this experience that I've had has really shaped me into a new version. And so I felt like it was really important to honor that. And it felt really special to also just reflect back on everything I've done in the time that I was working with my coach. And what I noticed was that I had accomplished so much more than I even thought. I think when you're in it and you're moving day to day and you're being really present, it can be hard to see just how far you've come. And I think it's really important to take that moment to pause and kind of look back and be like, wow, like, I've been putting one foot in front of the other for a period of time. And like now look at where I am on my path. And I think that coaching is a really beautiful way to to be supported on your path. And it's really important to find someone that who you want to be by your side as you navigate your journey. And I think like a really good coach really is just that. They're a guide. They're with you as you're walking, as you're putting one foot in front of the other. And they're there to really reflect back what they see in you and what they're noticing and acting almost as kind of a mirror. I think that it's really easy, especially when we're navigating obstacles and in an in between space, when we look at ourselves, you know, whether that's literally or metaphorically, it can feel like it's like you're looking in a fun house mirror. You can't quite see yourself clearly. And I think that a good coach and a good guide is able to, to just kind of be a little bit of an anchor when you're untethered and say, like, look, this is how I see you or have you noticed this or is this resonating? And they're not really, like, imposing themselves on, on you. They're really there to just be that mirror and to reflect back. I think that a really good guide is, is someone who really aspires to have their, their client feel like they, the coach did nothing. I think that's really my goal is, like, at the end of our time together, you would notice everything that you have accomplished and you wouldn't notice my presence as much or what I've done. I'm really just holding the shape and holding the space. And I think that's, that's a really important aspect of, of the coaching container because that's, that's what really allows you to explore and experiment. When you have someone kind of holding that shape for you, you can get really playful, really experimental. And so it felt really special to kind of close our work together for now and to, to have that distinct beginning and end. And now I'm kind of moving forward into what's next. And it's, it's a time to really take everything that I've done and like almost put it to the test and really just live and experience. And I'm sure the next obstacle, the next challenge, those things will appear. And then maybe, you know, it'll be time for me to seek out another, another mentor or another coach. So that's part of what I've been doing in my season of refinement, in the letting go, saying goodbye to this person who has really supported me and been there with me. And then also closing kind of that portal of transformation that I experienced through grief. Um, one thing that really came up in the session, we were just talking about my dad. And one of the things I mentioned when I first started working with her was that he really was my anchor. And I didn't even recognize how, how important he was to me when he was alive or how close we were. And then when my dad passed, I really felt his absence like so deeply. And I really learned how much of an anchor he was for myself and for others. And what was really interesting was that my coach reflected back to me that I am naturally an anchor and a stable force for those around me. And it felt really, really special and really tender to really have that in common with my dad. And I just feel like his natural essence of being that stable anchor is now integrated into me and my being. And to have that in common with him and not even know that to be true. So to now kind of know it and see it for myself, it just feels really special. And I feel so grateful to share that quality and to be able to be that for people in my life. And so that was something I never would have noticed or put together on my own. And it was just such an important moment for me. We also spoke about just kind of what's next for me. And my intuition gave me just a really fun visual. It kind of showed me like the little sparkle emoji. And what came forward was this moving into a life where there's infinite possibilities, and it's magical, and there's infinite abundance available to me. And it really just, it struck me like just how, I don't know, with grief, you really learn how short this experience is, and how to really be present and soak it all in, and as I'm kind of closing this grief portal, it just felt really special to even have the capacity to believe in magic and possibility and abundance again. And to really allow that in, I think I was just, I've been sad for so long, and there is like a sadness that comes up. I think where I'm at in my grief journey is that when I'm feeling joy, and when I'm thinking about possibilities and abundance, there's also a sadness there because I just really, I miss my dad so much, and I just wish that he could be here and experience it with me. So as much as it feels good to feel good again, there's a sadness that's also present. And that's the grief, right? That's that grief part that's integrated into me now. And I think it also is just really beautiful to have loved someone on such a deep level that you miss them regularly. And I'm really grateful for that and for that grief because it means that my dad is and was a really important figure in my life. So I'm grateful for the sadness, and it's present when I'm feeling happy, when I'm having fun. It's just it's always kind of there with me. It's almost like my grief is like a companion now. I have this forever companion and it's part of me, and I'm sure it'll come with me throughout the rest of my life. And I just want to honor it and say I'm really grateful for that, for all of the reasons I just shared. So yeah, that's kind of what's next for me, is really just starting to kind of look up at the sky and believe in possibility and start to really focus on what I want and build this new life for myself and this new chapter and feel really steady and stable and be that anchor for others. I really feel called to be in service in that way and to be a support for others who are going through the challenges and the obstacles of the human experience. And I think what's been really interesting about this grief journey is that on a spiritual, intuitive level, I do feel that interconnectedness. I know my dad's energy is around me, and we're all connected. And that doesn't absolve me from going through the human experience, the emotions, the sadness, the missing him, the paperwork, like all of it. It's like both, and I have that deep, intuitive connection to the universe. And I'm still a person having a human experience, and I have to go through all the emotions and be here on Earth and live in the physical realm. And so that's been really interesting. I thought that, I don't know what I thought, but I just wanted to share that, you can feel that interconnectedness and also all of the messy human emotions. It's all present. I think another, something else that I'm taking from this transformation journey, from my grief in between space, is just a deeper sense of trust in the unknown. I think in the beginning of the journey, when my dad first passed, I really wanted certainty. I wanted to know that everything was going to be okay. I wanted the answers. And now as I shift into a new chapter, I'm not craving certainty as much as clarity. And I think that is that's such an important distinction. We may not know for certain what will happen, but we can kind of dive deep into ourselves and find that clarity of what is next for us or what is important. And that clarity is how you will kind of feel anchored. And it's part of that unshakable energy, is being able to get really clear on who you are, what you value, you know, what your priorities are. And then you don't need to necessarily know where you're going. And maybe you do know where you're going. I'm getting this image of like being on a hike. I get like hiking imagery a lot, which is interesting. But it's like, you're on a hike, you see your path, you can't see the entire path, but you have a map, and maybe you have a compass, and you have those tools to navigate. So you know you're on your path. You know that there is a place you'll end up. There's, you know, an end spot to it, but you don't know the middle part. And all you can do is take your tools with you and navigate and put one foot in front of the other. And over time, you will get to where you need to go. But I think that that unknown is what makes life really magical, kind of allowing the universe to fill in those details for you. Because it's not as fun to know every little thing that's going to happen. It may feel comforting, like rewatching a movie or a show over and over. But then you don't get that little, like, excitement of trying to anticipate what's next. And that's what is so beautiful about life, is that you don't know what's coming. And if you can find that clarity in yourself and find that trust in your own unshakability, then you can really let life surprise you. And you'll trust that you know how to figure things out when obstacles and challenges arise. And so I think that clarity and that trust is more important than having the certainty. And that's what I'm taking from my grief journey. And so, yeah, that's what I have for you today. And just know if you are, you know, navigating grief, or you're in an in-between space, if you're feeling stuck, I'm really, I'm here to support you in whatever capacity feels good. You know, I'm right there with you, just navigating this experience. And if you're looking for a little more support, you're welcome to explore the Shoreline private coaching sessions. You can book a call with me and we can talk. There's more information on my website. There are resources. And just know that I'm really here for you. So I hope that you take good care while the waves carry you closer and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to today's episode. If you're new here, I'm so happy that you found your way to The Shoreline. And if you're returning, welcome back. I'm so glad that you're here. So last week, I spoke about this idea of being unshakable, and the image that my inner voice, my intuition gave me about a tree being uprooted and replanted, and rooting into the ground and becoming this unshakable force. And that theme has been continuing for me as this week unfolded. I feel like there's been a lot that's been coming up, and the word that comes to mind for me right now is refinement. I feel like I've made the big moves, overcome a lot of these big challenges and obstacles. I've been moving through grief. And now, as I shift into this unshakable version, and as I start to really plant roots where I'm at, I've been called to be in a season of refinement. And that to me means just kind of like, the image that's coming to mind is when you go to get your eyes checked, and they're showing you the different prescriptions, and going through is one better or two better. And it's like you're honing in on that perfect clarity. And I feel like that's what I've been working on energetically, of just saying yes and no to little things, and really getting clear on what this next version, what this next season of life is for me. And I've been having to kind of let go of ideas, of things, of potentials that maybe I thought I wanted, and I don't actually want, or they no longer align with my vision, but also letting go of the in-between space I've been in and also old pieces of my identity. One piece that kind of comes to mind, I'm thinking back to when I first kind of started my healing journey almost 12 years ago, I think. I remember sitting in therapy and my therapist kind of talking about, you know, my wounding and just like the experience of healing and how, you know, in therapy, you're kind of opening yourself up. You're opening these wounds and you're kind of going through them and you know that someday they'll heal and they will be more like scars. And I just couldn't imagine that point in time when I was first starting my journey. And I had a couple of experiences this week where it really felt like, wow, this identity that I had of really overcoming a lot of challenge and going through difficult experiences and having these wounds just out in the open, it really defined me for a while. And I just feel more distant from that version of myself. And I've really done the work, and I feel like I've healed a lot of that wounding, and they are really those scars. And I had to ask myself, who am I if I'm not navigating the world with wearing my wounds openly? And what does it feel like to be someone who is a little bit more healed, who has gone through the experiences and processed and is rooted down and more unshakable? And there was some grief that came up there for me of like, that version of me, that part of me, she's so tender and I just have so much love for her because it took so much courage to face some of those wounds and to really do the work. And I'm just so grateful that I did it, that she did it, and that I'm here now. And it was like a loving kind of letting go, but there was some grief there of like, okay, like I am me, she is me, but I'm also in this next version. So I really think that's part of the refinement process, is like letting go of these little identity pieces, almost like when you're kind of clearing out your closet and you have pieces that maybe don't fit your style anymore, but they hold a lot of beautiful memories and you kind of lovingly let them go. I think that the refinement energy has also been coming up for me. I feel like there's been a lot of, a lot of just ideas and opportunities and potential, and the universe is kind of like, well, you're interested in this. Do you want to do this? Or you used to do this. Maybe this is what she want. And I've had to really be like, okay, what is most important to me? And how can I prioritize that? And how can I really have the courage to say no to maybes? And I'm a generator in human design, which means that I'm meant to respond to things. And also, the wisdom of my body is what helps me say yes and no to things. If I'm not immediately excited, if it's not a full-bodied yes, it's a no. And I think that the trap that generators often fall into is the trap of the maybe of like, well, maybe I want to do this, or I'm not sure, let me think about it. It's not a yes, it's not a no, it's a maybe. And those are actually no's. And I've been really trying to work on that and sit with like, okay, if I'm not immediately saying yes, then it's a no. And maybe there's a reason and I can go through all the pros and cons, but really it's just, it's simple. It's just a no. And I think that like the more that I get into the habit of immediately saying no to these kind of things that sit in the maybe pile, the more that I'll have the opportunity to say yes to what like really excites me. And so that's what I feel like the lesson has really been this past week is like this refinement, there's like grief, but then there's like really just like getting clear on what I want, and learning to like only say yes when I can feel like that excitement internally. And to just let everything else go. I think I've shared this before, but every year around my birthday, which is the end of July, I do a tarot spread for the year ahead. And I pull a card for each month. And then I pull a card that is kind of the overall, that is the overall theme for the year. And I always like take a picture of it. I like write the numbers on the photo, and I just keep it as a favorite in my phone. And I really like to look at it throughout the year and just kind of check in with it. And it's so interesting because I feel like the themes are always so on point. Like they're so resonant each and every time. And I was looking at my card for May recently and thinking about the season we're in astrologically, with we're wrapping up Taurus season, and how during Taurus season, I was really focusing on those material things, my life, my routine, nourishing myself well, just all of those earthly things that Taurus brings up. And then I also looked at my card for May, which was the Seven of Pentacles, in the Wild Unknown deck, the theme that she kind of points out, it's called Period of Contemplation. And it's this sense of like, you've been on this journey, you've been growing and changing, and kind of climbing the mountain, and you're sitting there wondering like, has it all been worth it? Do I actually want what I say I wanted? Like, what is this all for? And those questions have been coming up for me, and I just find it so interesting that like, the cards always know, and I feel like that's also part of this refinement of the new version, is you kind of have to look back and be like, okay, I put in all this effort. Am I where I want to be? And can I also trust in my path unfolding and knowing that like, I don't know what's ahead, and I don't have all the answers? And I think that as part of this, for me, as part of this refinement kind of phase and energy, what comes up for me is like really letting go of overthinking. As I said, I'm a human design generator. So coming back to my body and trusting the wisdom of my body and my intuition. And it's so interesting because my overall theme for the year is the mouse card. And the mouse is all about like fixating on little details, anxiety, overthinking. And it just feels like in this moment of refinement and kind of wondering if everything's been worth it and being in this period of contemplation, I'm really being asked to look at how I use that pattern of overthinking and the value that I place on those thoughts. And I'm not saying it's bad to be an over thinker. I'm not placing judgment on it. But I've noticed in myself that there is a pattern of like when I get to a certain place, if something doesn't feel the way I thought it was going to, or when my goals and manifestations come to fruition and it doesn't feel like how I thought, I go into overthinking mode. And I think part of this new version of me, part of the refinement is really like letting that go and not letting it go in a sense of like, that's not allowed. Like I'm going to get rid of that part of myself. It's more like, okay, can I notice the pattern? And can I redirect the energy? And can I use the tools that I've built for myself to just shift back into my body, back into the wisdom of my intuition? And that's part of this becoming unshakable. I think it's really easy to get caught up in our thoughts, and the fears, and the what ifs, and survival. And a lot of times that is really self-destructive because we don't know what's going to happen next. All we can do is take the information that we have in the moment and make the next best decision. And so I've been really like sitting with that overthinking, and I've been practicing just coming back to simplicity for myself. And when I feel that kind of thought spiral coming on, or I feel like I'm really just in my head, I am trying to just use the tools I have, which for me is like just move through the energy through either movement, so working out, or going on a walk, or like coming back to my senses. So like going outside, looking at the trees and the flowers, or listening to music, doing something that's sensory, and that's what brings me back to my body and connected to the wisdom of my body and my intuition. And so I feel like there have been different situations coming up throughout the week that's kind of been almost like testing that, or like bringing it to the surface and just helping me see like when am I using my mind in a logical, analytical, productive way? And when am I shifting kind of into overdrive and into that overthinking? And how can I just kind of get back into my body quickly and like let that go quickly? Because I think it's not about eliminating these parts of us. I think it's actually really beneficial that I have that ability to be logical, to analyze, to think critically. It's more just like, how can I turn the volume down when it needs to be turned down? And how can I use other tools in my tool belt to just be more embodied and to come back to my whole self? It's not about eliminating the mind. It's like, how can all of these bodies of wisdom, the mind, the body, the intuition, how can all of that work together to help me kind of move through this human experience? And looking ahead, it's really interesting because I start to think about shifting into Gemini season. Gemini is an air sign. It's really intellectual. So like, of course, I'm going to be more in my head. And that's the challenge of like coming back to my practices, coming back to my body, coming back to my intuition in the season where I'm naturally going to be more, you know, in my mind thinking intellectual. So I've been kind of thinking about that, integrating astrology and my tarot reading and human design. Looking ahead, my card for June is The Bee from The Animal Spirit Deck. And The Bee is all about just kind of being in a season of like, working, but also like, finding joy in your work, and really being in like, the process versus the outcome. And I think that'll be really interesting. I'm curious to see how that unfolds and what kind of comes up for me in June with The Bee. It's also really funny because I feel like out on my walks, I've been noticing the bees like a lot more, and I started noticing them before I remembered and looked at my tarot reading. And once I looked at it and I was like, oh my gosh, the bee is coming up, and I've been noticing all these bees, and it just felt like this really wonderful synchronicity. So I'm really excited to just see like, how this next month unfolds being more focused on just like the process and working and just enjoying each moment and enjoying being present and really refining, continuing to refine as I shift into this new version. And just letting go, continuing to let go of the things I need to let go of, and just lovingly kind of saying goodbye to my current in-between season and really shifting into what's next. And kind of honoring all of the past versions of myself. As I continue to move forward, I really want to think about like, what does it mean to me to be unshakable? Like, what qualities am I embodying when I say that I want to be unshakable? And like, what do I really want from this next phase of life? I've been really thinking about that. And like, what is important to me? What am I prioritizing? And like, what do I want to get out of this next version, this next era, whatever it is? And so those are kind of questions I've just been sitting with. I don't really have any answers yet, and it hasn't come into full clarity. And maybe that's part of this time of refinement, is like, the picture will become clear as I continue to refine my energy. So I'm not really sure what's to come. I do have some ideas and goals. I think one of the biggest things that I've been kind of afraid to declare, so I haven't said it here, but I think it's really important to, I want to finish the first draft of my novel by the end of July. It's been something that's been with me for years, and I've been working on it on and off, and I've started over, and the story has just been living in my mind for a long time. And I really want to get it out on paper, and I want to finish it before my birthday, which is the end of July, as just like kind of this beautiful capstone to like wrap everything up. So I hope that I am able to complete my first draft by the end of July. We will see. I'm a little over a quarter of the way through writing it. But again, I have like a very detailed outline. I have the whole story in my head. It's really about just like sitting down and getting the words out and trusting that it doesn't have to be perfect. It's just about like getting it out on paper, and then I can go through the refinement process with it. So that's kind of the biggest goal that I have. Just work-wise and life-wise, I'm really hoping to just also take more time to enjoy Seattle summer, enjoy the sunshine, be kind of in more of a joyful, playful energy, and not take life too seriously. I've been in a really serious season with like navigating grief and kind of the logistical things that come from losing a loved one. And so I just want to feel lighter and, you know, not be in a season of like hustle and overwork and just have a lighter schedule, you know, work on my goals, but also like really soak it all in and take it all in and enjoy summer, enjoy life, and just really be in joy and play. So that's kind of what I feel like is ahead for me. Again, like I'm not really sure how it'll all unfold because that's the magic and beauty of the human experiences. Like we just don't know what's going to happen next. I've also been thinking about, yeah, how I can best support you, what I want to do in terms of the podcast, and what resources I want to offer. So just know that those things are kind of percolating in the background. And again, I'm always here for you. So that's what I have for you today. Know that if you're feeling stuck in the foggy middle, or you're exhausted from having to always figure it out alone, I want to invite you to explore the Shoreline private coaching sessions. I have a couple of spots open starting for summer. So you can find more information or schedule time to chat with me on my website. There's also a link in the show notes to my calendar and to information about the Shoreline coaching sessions. And so that's it for today. I hope that you take good care while the waves carry you closer and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello and welcome. I'm so glad you're here. For this episode, I've been toying with the idea of doing something a little bit different, and all roads have kind of been pushing me in this direction. So today, I'm going to be offering a collective tarot reading for the month of February. This is inspired by someone who I really look up to, Lee Harris and his guides, The Zs. Every month, they offer an energy update, where he talks about some different themes that he gets from his guides. And I've found his energy updates really grounding and supportive and aligned for me personally. And so taking that as kind of inspiration, I thought that I would offer you a tarot reading for the month of February. And this feels particularly aligned and important, because right now, the energy just feels really heavy, both for the collective and for me personally. And when I start to feel a little bit lost, when life feels really heavy, I find it's important to come back to the tools I know and one of the tools that always supports me is tarot. And so that's what I would like to offer you. A tarot reading, I'm going to pull some cards and just talk about the different themes that come up. So let's go ahead and get into it. For this reading, I'm going to be using the animal spirit deck and the tarot deck from The Wild Unknown. These are two decks that I've been using since I started doing tarot about nine years ago. They're the decks that I use when I do readings for others, and they're just always the ones I want to come back to. So again, I'll be using the animal spirit deck and the regular tarot deck from The Wild Unknown. And I'm going to be doing what's called a clarity reading. It's a four-card spread. There will be one card that's kind of the overall theme, and then three cards that are kind of the supporting elements or the factors at play. This reading, the clarity reading or spread, is the same spread that I use. If you were to book a one-on-one call with me for the Shoreline coaching sessions, this is kind of the same draw that I would do. So this gives you a little taste of what that might look like and what a clarity reading might look like, just kind of in a different way, because this is going to be more of a collective energy reading and not personalized to you. So let's go ahead and get into the cards. The first card that I drew is the overall theme for the month of February, and it's from the Animal Spirit deck. The card that I drew is the Firefly. This card is part of the air sign kind of set of cards, and the image on the card is very dark. There's a lot of kind of black on the card with a small drawing of a firefly in the center and a little bit of light radiating out from the firefly. And I really like this image because I think that the essence of this card is really guiding you to look at obstacles and challenges and difficulty in a different way. I like to kind of look at what's in my path as if it's intentional, as if it was put there to push me into a certain direction. And I think that this card is kind of reflecting that and showing that like during dark times or heavy times, there is opportunity for light. And in fact, maybe there is more opportunity for light, for creativity, for connection than if maybe everything was just sunny and perfect and fine. I think that this card is really guiding us to look for glimmers in our life. I've talked about this before that we're wired as humans to be constantly looking at what's wrong. And this isn't to say that you should just turn away from whatever is happening in your life. But I think it's about taking intentional time and space to allow the good in. This is a theme that's been coming up for me lately. I've been noticing just how unfamiliar it is for me after kind of going through a really difficult year to just allow things to be good, to allow myself to be okay, to take in positive experiences. And when the energy is heavy, when life feels really hard, that's what is important. And it doesn't have to be something big. It's about looking at those moments in your day where you can just take a deep breath and say, like, this is what I'm looking forward to. Maybe it's your morning cup of coffee, or maybe it's a walkout side, or maybe it's intentional time with your family, but just looking for those little glimmers of goodness, of hope, and just allowing it to kind of permeate into your being. And the other side of this card, I think, is really talking to creativity and inspiration. I think there's opportunity for really beautiful art to come through when we're struggling as a collective. And so this card is kind of encouraging you to take any bits of inspiration you get and really run with them. Make something. Create. Express yourself. Whatever that looks like, take what you can. And when those little bits of inspiration come in, use them and find a way to to express and allow that energy to really come in through you and go full circle and be released through expression. So that's kind of the overall themes that I'm seeing is really the energy to me feels really heavy. There's a lot going on. And yet, there is opportunity for connection, for hope, for light, for creativity, for inspiration. And how can we find those bits and allow them into our space, into our being? One thing that I really love about the animal spirit deck from The Wild Unknown is there's a bit in the guidebook at the bottom that talks about when the energy of the card is in balance, when it's out of balance, and what you can do to bring the energy into balance. And I love sharing these bits. I don't usually share too literally from the guidebook, but I just find these bits to be so helpful. So for the Firefly card, when it's in balance, writes creates brainstorms. So really tapping into creative energy, into inspiration, when out of balance, burnt out feels dull. And to bring into balance, write a poem or draw. So you don't have to, if you're not a writer, if you don't like to draw, you don't have to do those things. But I would say like to bring this energy into balance, find a way to express yourself creatively. Maybe it's through writing or a visual art, drawing, painting, maybe it's collage, maybe it's dancing or singing, whatever it is, find what works for you and find a way to get that creative energy out into the world. Okay, so let's get into kind of the supporting elements of this Firefly theme. For the supporting elements, I drew from the Wild Unknown tarot deck. So let's just get into it. The first card that I drew was the Daughter of Swords. The Daughter of Swords is another air card, which means that it has to do with our minds, with kind of intellect. And this card in particular is about, to me, it holds kind of the energy of perfectionism. This card is about having really good insights, but also kind of seeing too much. And whenever this card comes up for me, I think about just kind of zooming my perspective out a little bit, to kind of look at it more from like a bird's eye view, instead of looking at things kind of really close. And I think that in relation to the overall theme of the Firefly, this card is really asking you to kind of just take a step back and to kind of look at things from that greater perspective and to not always look at all of the little things that could have been done differently. Again, it's kind of that like what's wrong attention that I've talked about before. And instead of looking at all of the little ways that things can go wrong, all of the little mistakes in your days, in your weeks, can you zoom out a little bit and look at kind of overarching themes and look at maybe what's going right, what's good? Because I think that gives us the opportunity to really shift our perspectives and to kind of raise our energy a little bit and let go of a little bit of that heaviness. I think of like when I'm feeling super on edge or super stressed, it's like, I just want to cling tight to everything and I'll be gripping something really hard and not even realize it. And it's like, can you just let go a little bit? Can you take a step back? Can you release the need to tend to every little detail to try and plan out every single moment in your life? I think that this card is really asking us to release some rigidity. How can we be a little bit more flexible and find that flow? And flow doesn't always mean only doing what feels light, bright, good. It's more about in what ways in your life are you going against the current? And can you find a more easeful way to navigate? Can you kind of go with the current and allow it to give you a little bit of momentum instead of working so hard and trying to paddle against it? Because the current's going to be there no matter what. If you've ever been in a boat, on a paddleboard, in a kayak, you kind of can get that, understand that sensation of like when you're trying to like go against the current and you're not working with it, it's really a lot more work than if you were just kind of like, okay, where's the water taking me? And how can I use that flow to get where I want to go? It's about working with what's in your path instead of trying to work against it. So that's the Daughter of Swords. I want to move on to the next card, which is the Mother of Cups. And the Suit of Cups in Tarot really is talking about our emotional landscape. And the Mother of Cups to me is a really intuitive card. It holds the energy of the high priestess, but just kind of in a different way. And the card itself depicts a swan who's kind of like agitated, and her feathers are ruffled. And I think that that's a really good representation of the energy of this card. And, you know, a swan is a really refined, beautiful creature. We often see them kind of just floating on water, really calm, really tranquil. And this is depicting kind of the opposite of that. And I think it's asking us to kind of look at our own triggers. Like, where in our lives are we becoming a little bit aggressive, a little bit defensive? What is pushing us to kind of project? And really, like, where in your life do you hold a short fuse? And I'm not saying you need to go in and, like, fix it, but really just can you take that information and hold it in front of yourself and just kind of examine it and say, oh, wow, like, I didn't notice that, you know, when it comes to certain situations, I really have no patience. Like, where in my life am I feeling that agitated, aggressive energy? And maybe I dive a little bit deeper into looking at, why is that? What is, what am I being called to learn from this knowledge and this information that I'm taking in? And again, like, going with the flow, working with your intuition and working with those little nudges that you're getting, instead of just kind of pushing them away, how can you invite that in and give yourself a little bit of space to just say, like, wow, that really surprised me that, like, I randomly was in my car and got, like, road rage and wanted to, like, yell at someone or, you know, I was at the grocery store and this happened and now I'm upset or whatever it is. Like, the examples don't really matter. Whatever it is in your life, like, can you go one layer deeper and examine that on a deeper level? And again, going back to the overall theme of the firefly, can you view these agitations, these triggers as intentional parts of your path, showing you something that you need to know, shedding light on something that maybe was in the dark before, and it's coming forward to help propel you forward or to prepare you for what's next on your path that you can't see yet. And so, just holding the energy of the Mother of Cups, I think it's really asking us to evaluate and examine our emotional landscape. Look at those triggers that are coming up, looking at those little ways that we kind of can lose our cool and go a layer deeper. What's underneath the surface? What emotion lies beneath anger? Anger and aggression and being defensive, it's a way to protect ourselves. And what lies beneath that is maybe sadness, hurt, whatever it is. Can you go a layer deeper and just see what's beneath the surface and learn from it? And with that idea of learning, the next card that comes up is the Hierophant. And this card is part of the major Arcana of Terror, which just means that it's a card that holds a little bit more weight, and it's just a little bit... I don't want to say more intense, but it's more of like a heavy hitter. It's just like a bigger theme than maybe the other ones. I think it's just a more prominent card than the others. And the Hierophant really is about learning, seeking knowledge, and inviting a mentor kind of into your life. So maybe there's some area in your life where you've been really wanting to dive deeper or learn something more, and this card kind of is an invitation to maybe seek out mentorship in some way. Maybe that's working with a teacher of some sort, a coach, a guide. Maybe it's working with your intuition. Maybe it's going back to school, taking a class, taking an online class, whatever it is, I think that this card is is inviting you to go deeper in some aspect of your life, and also kind of invite new experiences in. Again, kind of with the other cards that have come up, it's about being open and flexible and just curious about what's going on in your life, and if there's something that you've always wanted to learn, or if there's some area where you're like, I feel like I just want to dive a little bit deeper, this card is giving you that invitation. And I think that you don't always, maybe you know what it is you want to sign up for or what you're leaning towards, but if you don't, and if you're just like, I have a desire to dive deeper, but I'm not really sure what that looks like yet. Set that intention, whatever that looks like for you, maybe you speak it into a voice note, maybe you write it down somewhere, just maybe you just think about it and set that intention of like, I want to dive deeper and I'm open to a teacher or a mentor coming into my life, and you'd be surprised at what might show up for you. So, that's your reading. Kind of also looking at these cards collectively. I wish that I could just kind of show you a picture really quickly, but I can't, so I will try to describe it to you. But all of these cards are very similar. They all have a lot of like, black in them. All of the backgrounds are really dark with like, little bits of light. And what's most interesting is on all of these cards, all of the animals depicted, they all fly. So all of the supporting cards, the Daughter of Swords, the Hierophant, the Mother of Cups, they're all birds. The Daughter of Swords has an owl on the card. The Hierophant is a crow, and then the Mother of Cups is a swan. And then finally, our overall theme is the firefly. And so there's a lot of like, buoyancy, a lot of airiness to this reading. And I just think that's just interesting to note. And so with all of the heaviness that I've noticed and that I've been feeling collectively and personally, I think that these cards are really guiding us to find light. Light in the sense of like good and positive experiences, but also just being a little bit more flexible and a little bit less rigid and like finding the flow where we can. And so that's where I want to leave you today. If you found this reading helpful, if you want to dive a little bit deeper, I am always here for you. You can always book a Clarity reading with me, and we can either build on what I've shared today, or we can do a completely new reading. Wherever you're at, I truly want to support you and help you find your way. And so reach out. You can go on my website, you can send me a message through the contact form, you can book a reading, you can just send me an email. I just want you to know that I'm here for you, and I support you. And that's what I have for you today. So I hope that you take good care while the waves carry you closer, and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to today's episode. I'd like to just kind of update you on what's been happening with me recently, and talk about making the shift from stillness into more action. So let's get into it. Back when I was doing my inner voice facilitator training in the fall of 2020, we talked about this idea of the two modes of a cheetah. There's the cheetah in still mode, so kind of like resting, non-movement. And then when it was time to shift, the cheetah would step into action. So cheetah in still mode, cheetah in action mode. And that idea has really stuck with me throughout the years, and I feel like it really, it embodies a lot of who I am as a person. And so the last few years, and especially last year, I've really been cheetah in still mode. I needed a lot of rest, a lot of slowness in my days. I needed my days to feel really open-ended, and I didn't want to pack my calendar too much or be busy. And I've ebbed and flowed between these two modes, I think my whole life, and really only recently have I been able to kind of identify that. And this cheetah in still mode phase that I've been in, it's lasted such a long time. It's been probably years. And then last year was just kind of the most intense version of kind of being in still mode. And it lasted so long that I kind of thought that this is who I am now. Maybe I'm not meant to be busy to have a packed calendar. Like that doesn't feel good. It's not aligned. And I kind of let it shape my identity of like, okay, I'm just living a slower, quieter, smaller life, and that's okay. And that's what I want. And then, last week, I was in a coaching session with my leadership coach, and we were just kind of talking about goals, and I mentioned that I've been pursuing a Pilates certification. So I signed up in fall of 2024, went through a series of intense training weekends where you go through a bunch of different modules. A Pilates comprehensive training is a 500-hour certification. So you go through six or so weekends of intense training, and then you're kind of released to complete a certain number of hours, and then you take a test to certify, and then you become a Pilates instructor. Well, right about the time that my dad passed away last year was when I was finishing the intensive weekends. I actually had to miss the final weekend because I was at home with my family kind of processing my dad's death. And last year, I really decided to let this go. I was like, I love Pilates, I love movement. Building community through movement has always been something that's really important to me. I grew up dancing, I played team sports, I played volleyball for a long time, and then in my adult life, I loved and still love doing group fitness classes with friends, and it's just something that is really important to me. And I had really just let go of the idea that I would ever finish this Pilates certification. And last week in my coaching session, my coach was just kind of like, I think you need to get back to teaching. I was a bar instructor for a couple of years before I injured my ankle, and she was like, you know, I think it's time. Like, what do you think about that? And I was like, well, actually, you know, I've been pursuing this Pilates certification, and it's not like I had stopped doing Pilates. I've kept up a Pilates practice. I go to classes. I've been, you know, practicing for a while, and it's something that's really been become integrated into my life. I had just really let go of the outcome of finishing my certification. And so we talked about that, and she was like, do you want to certify? Like, do you want to teach Pilates? And I was like, I do, but it feels overwhelming the number of hours I have left and the whole process. And it turns out that my leadership coach has some experience in the Pilates world, and she really offered some support and was like, let me reach out to who I know and kind of see how I can support you in the process. And that conversation really just gave me the momentum to get things going again. And it's so funny because before that conversation, I had been receiving little nudges. I was at a class at the Pilates studio I go to, and I was buying little sticky socks, and the instructor I was purchasing them from was like, oh, when you start to teach, you'll know that you can save your older sticky socks for when you're teaching versus the newer ones that are going to be a little bit stickier and better for doing Pilates. And I remember when she said that, like, when you start teaching, you can do this. I just felt this wave of like, I just felt super bummed out. Like, my heart kind of sank, and I was like, oh, am I ever going to teach? Is that going to be me? And that kind of unlocked this desire that had been dormant. And then I think another, I felt like another nudge at a different point. And then I had this conversation with my coach, and I started getting all of this momentum. And then my Pilates instructor, the one who I take private lessons from, she reached out and she was like, oh, do you want to observe these sessions? And she was like, you can even start practice teaching with me and offered me support. And I just was so amazed at how when you set that intention, even if you don't verbalize it to anyone, that starts to put things in motion, and then things start to manifest in the physical reality. And so I feel like that feeling of my heart sinking and when I was talking about Sticky Socks really unlocked that desire. And then all this support and all these opportunities started to come in. I expressed to my coach that I wanted this. I took action and I received opportunities and said yes to them. And I feel like this is a really great example of shifting from stillness into action. And the whole Pilates conversation came up with my coach because every week for the past month or so, I've been coming to session and just saying like, oh, oh, I want to do this or I did this and it doesn't feel great. And I kind of got to this point where I was just really almost like stewing in my thoughts and thinking about taking action versus just taking the action. And so part of I think what sparked her to push me in this direction was this need for me to take action more than think about taking action. And I think that's a really great indication that it's time for you to shift from cheetah in still mode to cheetah in action mode. If you're in a space where you've been still for a long time and you've needed that slowness and then for whatever reason, that starts to not be as nourishing. I think that's what I noticed for myself is I started to feel myself get into these little thought loops and really start to ruminate and overanalyze. And I was feeling more depleted by having an excess of time in my day and having not that many things on my calendar and all of the thinking and the journaling and my more stillness activities started to deplete me more than they energized me. And that was a great indication that it's time to step into action mode. I've completed the cycle of stillness and I'm ready to start building again. And so I just wanted to share that because it might be helpful to you. Maybe you've been in a season of stillness and you're not feeling as nourished by it. It might be ready for you to start taking action. And I think for myself, the what I've been doing as kind of an exercise is when I find myself sitting for too long and thinking about taking action and trying to figure out the best way, the right way to do something, I just get up and I do something. And I think that thinking about taking action versus just taking action is a good distinction. So maybe if you're in a place where you're trying to kind of jumpstart into action mode, just start taking actions. They can be big, they can be small. It doesn't really matter what it is, but get yourself into more of that movement and that busyness and that momentum. And as you're doing that, kind of releasing the attachment to the action, releasing the need for a specific outcome, and just kind of start doing things and seeing what manifests. And that's not to say you shouldn't act with clarity and intentionality. I think that's the really great thing about these two modes is when you're in stillness mode, you're building your intentions, you're thinking about your values, you're processing where you've just been, and it creates a really beautiful foundation for you to kind of launch from and move into action. And I think that when you shift into action mode, you can trust in what you've already built and the work you've already done and know that you are moving intentionally and with clarity, and you don't necessarily need to stop and think, okay, what's my intention? Am I clear about this? Let's do the thing. You can just kind of do the things because you already know where you're wanting to go or what you're wanting to do. You've already built that intentionality and clarity into yourself. So that's kind of what I've been doing specifically with my Pilates journey. I'm really refocusing my energy. I'm looking at the hours I have, the hours I need. I've expressed that my goal is to certify before the end of the year, and now I'm looking for those opportunities and receiving the support I need to actually make it happen. And the momentum that I've created in my Pilates journey has kind of created other little sparks elsewhere. I think I have to be more intentional and on top of my schedule, so I'm being really focused with how I'm spending my energy and I'm really refining what my days look like. And by doing that, I'm really only doing things that align with my values and are really important to me. So taking care of myself, moving my body, nourishing myself well, pursuing my Pilates certification, meeting with my coach to get even more clear on what I want, scheduling time to work on my novel, setting a routine to record podcast episodes for you. And it's created this beautiful kind of cascade of now I'm noticing by being in action mode, I'm having a lot of days that feel really full and fulfilling. And that's not to say that stillness mode, cheetah in still mode is not fulfilling and not full. It's just a different energy. And I think that I got a little bit stuck in still mode and it feels really good to have shifted out of it. I think too naturally, I like being in movement. I like moving my body a lot, but I also like kind of bouncing from thing to thing. And I'm learning that it's okay to have a lot going on and to be multi-passionate. And I can do so in a really intentional and focused way. It doesn't have to be this chaotic energy that maybe I used to embody when I'm younger. And it feels really good to approach a season of action mode with this new perspective and with all of the new wisdom that I've gained from my still mode, that I've gained from kind of going through this initiation of grief. And that's not to say that the grief isn't still there. It very much is. But we are complex people. Humans are complex, and we can hold many things at once. So yes, I'm holding my grief. It's something that's a part of me now. And also it's brought me so much wisdom and perspective. And I think what I've learned is that, you know, life, this is really tripe, but life is really precious. And we have a finite amount of time here on Earth. And I want to make sure that I'm using my time well, and I'm doing the things that really light me up and that align with who I am and what I care about. And it takes that kind of ebb and flow from still to action to really refine that. And I think that both sides of the coin are really important. If you're only in action mode, you might lose that intentionality. If you're only in still mode, you might just kind of live in your head forever. So I think it's this beautiful kind of an ebb and a flow. I'm thinking about kind of an infinity sign, and you kind of you move to one side, and then you stay too long on the other side, and it's time to kind of shift, and you're just kind of moving in this figure eight forever. And I think that's what's really exciting is, you know, now that I've shifted more into action mode, I know that I'll move into a phase of stillness again, and that'll be really fruitful, and then I'll come back to action. It's not a goodbye forever. It's just a goodbye from now. I'm transitioning into new energy. I think that this is so funny, this shift into action mode for me specifically, because I just talked about, you know, a quieter start to the year, New Year's energy not necessarily aligning for me, and here I am just like ready to like take action in winter. So I think that's a really wonderful part about life and being human is it's things that are unexpected happen all the time. It's unpredictable, and you can have a plan for yourself. You can fall into a rhythm, a cadence, and then things change. And I think that's why we have to build in our ability to be agile, to pivot when necessary, to understand what makes each of us tick, and to know yourself really well, so that you can honor your own rhythm, so that you can, when a pivot comes, when something unexpected comes, you know, like, is this, whether it's a distraction, or whether it's something that's really true for you. And so, that's what I have for you today. I hope that this was helpful. And if you feel like sharing whether you're a cheetah in still mode versus a cheetah in action mode, I would love to hear from you. You can reach out to me via my website, using the contact page. You can send me a DM on Instagram. I'm at Kim Coghani there, K-I-M-K-O-G-A-N-E. And I would love to hear from you. If you're not sure whether you're a cheetah in still mode or a cheetah in action mode, or you're feeling like you're still stuck in that foggy middle, I'd invite you to explore The Shoreline private coaching sessions. You can find more information or schedule a time to chat with me at my website, www.kimkogani.com. So that's it. I hope you take good care while the waves carry you closer. Your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to today's episode. Last week, I shared the transition I'm going through from a season of stillness to one of more action. And today, I want to explore kind of what happens in the aftermath of that. So let's get into it. This week, I've been really feeling just honestly kind of a little out of flow and things have felt just not as aligned as they usually do. And I've noticed this is a pattern that happens for me when I shift into action. I build some momentum, things feel really great, and then there's kind of that drop that happens after. I think I mentioned it in a previous episode, kind of that shift from having a really aligned day to maybe a day that's not so aligned, or where everything feels off, or where old patterns kind of resurface. And that's kind of what's been happening for me, but just on a different scale, it's happening more in kind of a weekly rhythm. And it's not to say that anything is wrong or bad. This is a natural part of what happens in the in-between when you're starting to take action and make changes. Old patterns resurface, and there's things coming to light that maybe just need your attention. So for me, this week of kind of not being in flow, I've noticed my tendency to emphasize action, especially when I'm in action mode. And I think what's been calling to me is to explore what it looks like to balance action with stillness while I'm in a season of being more action-oriented or action-forward. In past seasons of being in kind of a season of action or action mode, I would give everything 110% of my attention, and that led to kind of a cycle of overgiving, burnout, exhaustion, and then kind of like a crash and burn where I would need to just like shift into stillness really quickly and stay there for a while. And what I'm noticing now is that desire and that need to kind of shift out of that pattern and I think find a more refined way to kind of shift between the energies. And so this week, I noticed myself kind of leaning into action more and I've made some good progress. I'm, you know, pursuing my Pilate certification. I'm recording regularly here. I'm writing and I'm exploring kind of what I want to build and create. And in that, I feel like I kind of got swept up in the current of action and movement and busyness. And busyness is something that is really seductive to me. It feels good to be in action. And I think especially in American culture, we really pride ourselves on being busy and productive. And it's kind of worn as like a badge of honor. And so I think there's a lot of support in that. But what I noticed this week is that my body was really giving me signals that I need to take time to rest. I wasn't leaning into or choosing some of the quiet or nourishing activities that I know really support me. And as a result, I started to feel worn down. My body was starting to give me, you know, warnings. My ankle was feeling a little bit more tender. I was just feeling kind of like, okay, I need to take a moment to kind of pause and reflect or we're going to move into that kind of crash and burn exhaustion moment. And I think at first, I really felt like, if I'm being honest, kind of like a failure of like, okay, like I've been doing this work for so long, and I know intellectually what I'm supposed to be doing. So why, why am I revisiting this old pattern, or why is this coming up, or why am I not able to do it all? And what I've been exploring is, is that need revisiting that that needs to know why and trying to shift my perspective to say, okay, instead of seeing this as a failure or a repeating of an old pattern, it's something that's surfacing and an opportunity for me to learn and to grow and trying to approach it with more curiosity. I think it's also important in these moments to reflect back and see how far I've come. I think it's really easy to kind of overlook moments of progress or celebrations. And that's a really important part of the process, to pause for a moment and to say, hey, like, look, I'm actually doing the thing that I said I wanted to do, and I'm making progress. I may not be exactly where I want to be, or I haven't reached the outcome or the goal yet, but I'm well on my way. And so I tried to take moments to say, look, like, what have I been doing, and where am I at versus where was I even just a month ago or a few weeks ago? And that kind of helped me shift how I was feeling in my perspective, and it was able to show me, like, wow, I actually am making progress. You know, three months ago, I wasn't recording my podcast. The podcast didn't exist in this iteration, and now it does. And even today, I really didn't feel like recording, if I'm being honest, and I wasn't really sure what I had to talk about. And I decided to just show up anyway and see what happened. And if, you know, after a couple of minutes, nothing was flowing, I gave myself permission to kind of let it go. And here I am, and things are coming up, and it feels really good to show up to the things that are important to me, even when I can't give 100%, even when the alignment isn't perfect. And that's kind of what my overarching goal is for this year and going forward, is to really build long-lasting, sustainable, consistent actions. I'm not trying to build things just for a season. I really crave that consistency and working towards something and building a very strong foundation. And in order to build a strong foundation, you have to look at what's already been built. And if this was a true, like if my life was a house and I was truly looking at the foundation, then I would have to look at all of the little cracks. And that's what these old patterns resurfacing are. They're just little cracks, little worn bits of the foundation. And now I have the opportunity to look at them and refine them and decide how to move forward. And these moments of not quite being in flow are really an important part of the process. I think it's, they're really, it's underrated. And kind of looking back over this last week, I'm really grateful that I had the opportunity to reflect and to kind of look at the ways of being that I've embodied in the past, and kind of hold them out in front of me and say like, okay, these aren't an inherent part of my identity. They're just the ways of being that I've experienced in the past, and what do I want to do with them now? How do I want to move forward? Kind of like if you were to, you know, declutter your home and you're looking at all of the objects you've collected over the years, you get to choose, like, is this still important to me now, or is it something I'm ready to let go of? And that's what I've kind of been doing in my life. And it's this beautiful process of refining my energy. And that word refinement has been kind of coming to me. My intuition has been bringing that forward a lot lately, and it's not about the big actions, the significant movements. While those are important, refinement is just as important. And I've made a lot of the big actions. I've shifted into a new era, a new home. And now I get to refine as I kind of build these long-lasting, consistent actions I want to take. And what I'm being called to learn in this season is really, how do I show up to the things that are important to me, even when I'm not feeling 100 percent, even when my circumstances are not perfectly aligned? Can I still do the things that I say I'm going to do? And the answer is yes. I showed up to my novel even when I didn't feel like writing, and maybe it wasn't, you know, a session where I got through a thousand plus words, and it was more like I wrote a few sentences, or I wrote some notes to myself of what I want to incorporate, and guess what? I felt really good and accomplished after doing that. I felt really proud of myself for just showing up, even more so than when I think I have those really great flowy sessions. And even now, showing up to record and to share, the longer I speak and the more I get into it, the better I'm feeling. And I think that's an important part of being in action mode or a season of action is how can you continue to take the steps, even under imperfect circumstances, and how can you continue to push the needle forward to make progress in a smaller way or, you know, in a quieter way when you're not able to take those bigger actions or when you're not feeling like you want to do that? And how can you support yourself along the way? And that support piece is also really important. That's something that I've been kind of reflecting on instead of kind of thinking about my tendency to think about why or how, like, why am I feeling this way? How did I get to this point? Instead of doing that, I've been trying to shift when I feel like thinking about why or how, I've been asking myself instead, what do I need? If I'm feeling tired, instead of thinking about why am I so tired, or like, how did I get to this place of like, not replenishing my energy, I pause and I ask myself, what do I need right now? Maybe it's a nap. Maybe it's just time to be still, or time to zone out and look at my phone, or maybe I need food, whatever it is, I'm trying to just pause and say like, okay, what do I need? How can I support myself? It doesn't really matter how I got to this point. What matters most is, what do I need to keep going? And then I think the last component of this is really trust. Can I trust that everything is unfolding the way that it's meant to? Can I trust that I'm in the exact place I need to be in right now, and that these patterns are coming up for a reason, and at this moment, because that's what's important? And I think when I can lean into trust, it shifts me out of the state of feeling out of flow even. It kind of gives me that perspective I need of, okay, like this is just temporary. This feeling of being out of flow or out of alignment is coming up because it's part of my timing. It's something that needs to be addressed in this moment, and it's part of my progress. It's part of my way forward. And just recognizing that it really is all part of your path, the action, the stillness, the alignment, the non-alignment even, the old patterns, everything. It's all part of your path and how you move forward. And so, that's where I'm at today. I just wanted to kind of share a real time update with you. And I'm so thankful and so grateful that you're here and following my journey. And wherever you're at, if you're feeling stuck in the foggy middle, maybe you're exhausted from having to always figure it out alone, I want you to know that you're not alone. And I'm here. Maybe you feel polled to explore the Shoreline private coaching sessions. I'm always here to chat with you, and you can find more information or schedule a time to talk with me on my website, www.kimkogane.com. Take good care while the waves carry you closer. Your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to today's episode. I hope that you're having a really great start to 2026, and today, I want to dive deeper into the different seasons of The Shoreline. So we'll just get right into it. When I was dreaming up The Shoreline, the coaching sessions before I kind of even knew that it would transform into this podcast, I was thinking about the various in-between seasons I've experienced and how there's kind of a pattern to them. I would say that there are four distinct seasons of the in-between. The first one I will call or I'm calling unmoored. Then you shift into adrift, then weathering the storm, and then forging ahead. And there's really no timeline for each of them. I've experienced them as longer seasons, maybe taking months or even years to move through. And then I'll experience all of them in the span of a few days. So I just want to say that there's no real timeline, but I find it helpful to kind of create these distinctions and these different seasons because it helps bring awareness to where you're at in the in-between, and it kind of gives you something to anchor and to hold on to when you can often feel untethered. And it helps you kind of better understand what you might need when you're going through one of these seasons. So again, the four seasons are unmoored, adrift, weathering the storm, and forging ahead. So I'll just dive into the first one, unmoored, and this is kind of the first one that you tend to experience when you enter the in-between space. And this is that feeling of leaving something behind and not yet knowing what's next. So it's that idea of you're in your boat, and you kind of just untied the rope, and you've left the dock, but you can still see the marina, the land behind you. So you're setting off to see, you're entering into this unknown in-between space, but you can kind of just see where you've been. And unmoored is often this time of you've completed a cycle, you've reached kind of the end point of your previous journey, and you're ready to kind of see what's out there, to grow into the next version of yourself, but you're really at the beginning. And this time can be really a sensitive time because you're kind of, you're comparing an ending to a beginning, and it can feel really uncomfortable to leave a known space, to leave what you're good at, what feels comfortable as you kind of embark on something new. And sometimes this is a choice, maybe you're intentionally choosing to leave a career, leave a relationship, leave a place. And other times, you're kind of forced into it. Maybe you get laid off, or you lose someone close to you. So it can be an intentional conscious choice, and then sometimes timing chooses for us, and we kind of find ourselves in this place. I think what's really helpful during this unmoored season is really looking for grounded support and honest reflection. So this time can be really destabilizing. It can be really dysregulating for your nervous system. So finding ways to ground yourself as you're kind of moving away. Like, if you're imagining you're in a boat, you can feel that there's not solid ground beneath you, you know. The boat's rocking, you're moving with the tide and the water. So how can you find a way to feel grounded in that space, to feel the support and the stability of your boat? Whatever that looks like for you. And then really take time to reflect. Why are you leaving behind what you're leaving behind? You know, if this was maybe a conscious choice, and you're intentionally setting sail, you can look back and remind yourself, okay, these are the reasons why I chose to leave this behind. And just give yourself that time and space to kind of reflect on where you've been. If it wasn't a conscious choice, and maybe timing and the universe kind of stepped in for you, I think it's important also to take the time to reflect and really think back, like, okay, I didn't necessarily choose to leave where I was, to leave what's comfortable, and yet here I am. So how can I take this as an opportunity to make my circumstances even more aligning for myself? What am I being called to step into, and what am I being called to let go of? This is a really tender time. And I think that it's easy to still feel really attached to who you once were and what you've built. And you'll have those moments of wanting to go back to the way things were. And that's okay. I think it's really important to just be gentle with yourself. I remember the most significant unmooring season I had was when I made the choice to close my jewelry company. I knew that that was the right decision. I had been burning the candle at both ends for years, and I felt just really burnt out. I had fallen out of love with the job, with making jewelry, and I had so many moments of questioning, like, was this the right decision? And should I have kept going? Like, what's next for me? I have no idea. And I think what really helped me during that time was to grieve what I left behind, to really honor what I had created and to honor that version of me that built a successful company and jewelry brand, and to just really meet yourself where you're at. It's okay to feel whatever feelings come up. And I think it's really important to take time to really let go, to transition out of where you once were before you start to step into this next phase. I think so often we jump from thing to thing. I think about that, like, kind of in the workday, you might have to shift from meeting to meeting, from thing to thing, and we don't often give ourselves time just to transition. And I think about this season of being unmoored, and the in-between season in general is really about honoring transition. It's about letting go and saying, okay, this is where I was, and that was great, and I'm going to take a moment to just honor and appreciate that before I move into the next thing. And so, that's what I really want to invite you to do if you're in a season of maybe feeling unmoored, is really honor your transition. Take the space that you need to reflect. Call in support. If you're not sure of what you need, call in support from an outside force. Talk to a friend or loved one. Maybe you work with a coach. Maybe it's going to a yoga class or getting a massage, whatever it is. Really, really support yourself here. And trust that you made the right decision. And you're just moving through grief and this energy and that's part of the process. And you'll kind of know... You'll reach a point where you can't necessarily see the land or what you left behind as you kind of move through this season. You know, the land will... It'll get smaller and smaller, and then you'll kind of find yourself just out to sea. And that's when you know that you've shifted into the next season, which is Adrift. So this one's a really interesting one. There's a lot of spaciousness here, and it can be one that is really kind of foggy or unclear. You'll get these little sparks of energy where you feel like anything's possible. You'll be really ready to build, and then you'll reach the other side of the spectrum where you'll feel like, okay, I'll never be where I was. It's not possible. And you're kind of... You're feeling this full spectrum of emotions, and your emotions are kind of all over the place. Like, it's not moving linearly. You might feel like your days and your weeks are kind of like a roller coaster, and you're oscillating between having really great days that feel super aligned, super positive. You're so happy in what you've chosen. And then maybe the next day, you'll just feel like everything's off. You might feel really frustrated. And I just want to say that it's perfectly normal to experience that. I went through a few years of being in this phase of like really being connected to my intuition, feeling the magic, and having these really great days. And then the next day, it would totally flip-flop, and I would feel really low energy, really frustrated. I would question whether I made the right choice, and I would just feel really like everything was kind of off. And so, that's, I think, the key indicator that you're in this space of feeling adrift, is when you're kind of moving through these extremes all at once. And that can be a really confusing time, and it can be hard to know what you need. And I would really recommend, like, taking the space to nurture your clarity without pressure. And know that you're not gonna have that crystal clear vision necessarily. This is a really sensitive time where I think it's important to really support yourself with nourishing activities, whatever that looks like for you, because you can kind of be in the thick of it. You're out to sea. You can't see where you once were, but there's no land in sight. You're just kind of like in the middle. Imagine you're in the middle of the ocean, and there's just water all around you, and you're just in this boat, like, where do I go? I don't know my direction. I don't know how long I'm gonna be out here. I have no idea where I am in time and space. And that's really confusing, and it's hard to clarify a vision when you're in that space. And so I would really recommend, like, when you feel those sparks, really latch on to them, follow them, see where they lead, but without attachment, without needing to fully express whatever outcome you're being called to. It's really a season of exploration, of rejuvenation, of being curious and creative. There's so much potential here, and it's not necessarily a time where you're, like, building something new. It's just about figuring out, like, where you might want to go. And I think the magic in the adrift season is that anything is possible. You're completely untethered. You can go wherever you want to go. You can become whoever you want to become. And there's so much magic in that, and so much possibility. So I would really encourage you, if you find yourself in this kind of adrift state, to just allow yourself to explore, and don't discount any curiosities or any nudges you have, because you just, you don't know where they'll lead. So explore all possibilities, and really give yourself the time and the space to do so. The next season you move into after adrift is what I like to call weathering the storm. So you've had this moment of feeling those sparks, following the nudges, you're oscillating between kind of really, like, high creative energy, and then feeling kind of, like, down. You're having really aligned days. You're having days that feel off. And finally, you get to a place where you're like, okay, I'm comfortable out at sea. I kind of know where I want to go. And then the storm comes. Here in weathering the storm, you're already turning inward, but you really need rest and warmth and comfort before you're ready to emerge. This is kind of that messy cocoon stage where it feels like things have to kind of get worse before they get better. As a storm is, it's really wavy, it's tumultuous. It can often feel heavy and almost like life feels kind of gray. It really reminds me of like in Seattle, like the winter season. Right now, it's like super gray. The days are short. The sun doesn't really come out and the energy and the atmosphere is just thick. And I think that this is a really misunderstood season. I think like when you think of weathering the storm, or you think of winter and this thickness and this heaviness, it's like, oh, I don't want to go through that. But there's so much opportunity here. You can really just turn inward. It's about moving at a slower pace and not forcing anything, not trying to take big action and push things forward. It's really about tuning in to your inner landscape and what might be going on internally for you. It's also a really great time to build new tools and resources. It's a great time to focus on, like, regulating your nervous system or tending to your physical body and moving into different practices that can support you. It's a season where you are transforming. The work is happening. Like, if you think of a caterpillar in a cocoon. I know I'm working with bringing up a lot of different imagery. But stay with me. If you're thinking about that caterpillar in a cocoon, the caterpillar is transforming into a butterfly. That just is. It's happening. You don't need to forcefully make it happen. It's more about how can you support that transformation? What does the caterpillar need to help that transformation happening? It's a huge process of like shifting cells, and that is happening in your physical body too. You're becoming a new version of yourself. You're energetically shifting. And so I would invite you to think about like, what do you need during that time? What would best support you in your season of weathering the storm? Maybe it's time under a weighted blanket. Maybe it's just having more downtime in general. Maybe you need some time to escape and read a book or watch a movie. Maybe you need to get out and like move through your energy and you're exercising more. Maybe it's like caring for yourself through nourishing food. Whatever it is, I invite you to really explore and find kind of those options and create a menu for yourself of like, what do you reach for when you're in the space of needing rest, when you kind of feel like a weary traveler? What supports you? I think that's really important to know what you need as you kind of move through heavier seasons. And then also trust that this season won't last forever. Time is always moving forward. Change is inevitable, so you're not going to be here forever. I know it can feel like that, but just trust that you are moving forward. Things will shift. The storm will pass. And then you'll find yourself in the fourth and final season forging ahead. So when you're forging ahead, you've moved through the storm. You're ready to move forward, and you're ready to build kind of on your own terms, in your own way, with maybe reaching for a guide, not a guru. So I think that with forging ahead, it's really important to find that, that support that enables you to figure out your own path forward, instead of finding a predetermined path. When you're in the season, you'll probably experience more, days that are good, that feel, you know, high energy. You'll feel like you're overall in a more aligned place. You may not know exactly what's next, but you're really excited to figure it out. And maybe you've taken some of your ideas from when you were adrift, and you're starting to build those out and really vision your future. This one, I feel like, is such an exciting one. Maybe you do see land up ahead, and you know where you're going, but you don't necessarily have to. I think that's the most exciting part about forging ahead is that you may not know exactly where you're going, but there's that excitement and curiosity that's present. So those are the four different seasons of The Shoreline. If you're curious about which season you may find yourself in, and one of them didn't resonate right off the bat, you can go to my website and take a short quiz that I've created to help you kind of figure out which season you're in. And again, I've already said this, but as you're moving through the stages, it's not always a linear experience. It's not like, okay, like winter is weathering the storm, and then spring is forging ahead, and it doesn't necessarily follow certain timing or a calendar. You can move through all four seasons in a couple of days. It can take you years to move through one of them. So it's not linear, and you can spend different amounts of time in each season. And within each season, maybe you experience these different phases within one of the larger over-arching seasons. I would really encourage you to listen to your own inner wisdom, your own inner guide, and what's resonating personally with you. And maybe it doesn't feel good for you to define your seasons. I really like this approach because it helps me better understand what I need and how I can support myself. And I really love being able to create a story for myself and kind of create that path as I'm kind of moving through transition in the in-between. I would say that right now, I'm in a space where I'm moving through these four seasons pretty rapidly and in a cycle. So I keep revisiting them, but I'm not spending a ton of time in each season. I feel like I've done that in the past where I've really hunkered down, and I've spent, like I said before, years in some of these phases, and really I've gotten to know them. And now as I'm kind of transitioning and shifting into my next version, it's more like a light revisiting of like, okay, like I know what it feels like to be unmoored. Like, what do I need now to support myself? How do I tweak my tool belt and my support system as I kind of move through it? And then I'll go to being adrift, and I'll revisit that and know like, okay, like when I'm in this space, I know that I really just need to take time to just be and not force anything and not try to pressure myself into clarity, and just allow my emotions to kind of like, be all over the place. And when I'm in weathering the storm, I know that it's time to slow down. And maybe I'll bring in some new tools of what that could look like, or maybe, you know, all of the things I've established are already really great for me. And so it's been an interesting time just to move through these at a quicker pace and kind of be like, yes, this works, but this doesn't work. And how do I want to move forward? And what's working for me? So if this is something that is resonating with you, I would invite you just to explore with curiosity. And again, if you want a little support in knowing what season you're in, you can go to my website and take the quiz. And then I'd love to know what season you find yourself in and what seasons you've been in in the past and which one might resonate with you the most. So feel free to reach out. You can always send me a message on Instagram or email me with whatever's on your mind. And if you're feeling like you're stuck in the foggy middle, if you're exhausted from always having to kind of figure it out alone, I would invite you to explore the Shoreline private coaching sessions. You can find more information or schedule a time to chat with me on my website, www.kimkogane.com. That's kimkogane.com. And that's all I have for you today. I hope that you take good care while the waves carry you closer and know that your next version is already waiting for you on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to the first episode of 2026. I'm so glad that you're here, and I hope you're having a lovely start to the year. Today, I kind of want to dive into the new year and new year's energy and why that might not resonate with you. So let's just get into it. The new year, I feel like there's so much hype, kind of, that leads into it, and it's this really wonderful opportunity to hit the refresh button. And there's so much messaging out there about transformation, reinvention, setting goals, taking action. And if that isn't resonating with you, or maybe you don't feel drawn to that kind of energy or moving quickly, I just want to reassure you that it's okay. There's many different starts to the year, and we always have the opportunity to check in with ourselves and hit the refresh button. We're in the season of winter. Winter's really just begun. The solstice in December is what marks the beginning of winter. And kind of this time of slowing down, of hibernation, of really getting cozy, where I am, the days are shorter. It's dark in the evenings. It's cold and oftentimes rainy. And nature and my surroundings are kind of pushing me to a slower pace and to kind of turn inward. And that might be the same for you. And even if you find yourself in a place where that's not the case, maybe you're not in a place where there are distinct seasons, you might still be feeling that energy. And that's okay. I really encourage you to find what rings true to you. And in fact, there are many different starts to the year. Starting a new calendar year is really only one of many options. You could be someone who celebrates Lunar New Year in February, or maybe you mark the beginning of your year through your birthday, your solar return, or maybe you feel really aligned with the astrological new year, with Aries season that starts in March. There are several different perspectives out there, and I really encourage you to take what works for you and leave the rest. For me, I really feel aligned with my birthday kind of being the beginning of a new year. My birthday is in the summer, and I've always really been drawn to fall energy and that feeling of going back to school. And even though I'm not in school anymore, I always feel that come fall. I always feel excited to kind of begin and refresh my wardrobe, get my stationery in order, and kind of set new routines. And so that's really what works for me. And it's not really, it's not the beginning of a new calendar year. And so because my birthday is in summer, I feel like this is a really great opportunity to kind of just do like a light refresh and to hit the reset button. So I'll kind of just share what I'm doing this year. The new year really acts as like a midpoint, a mid-year or a mid-cycle check-in because it's around my half birthday. And that's kind of what I've been doing over the last like week or so is just kind of thinking about, okay, where have I gotten distracted? Where am I not showing up in a way that really serves me and what changes can I make and kind of how can I shift my perspective? Sometimes it's not even about taking action or implementing a new routine or adding. It's really just pausing and seeing things from a different perspective and shifting maybe how you're looking at something. So I've been looking at, you know, what's distracting me? And then along that same line, what's most important to me? What am I committed to this year? And how can I support those commitments and show up to them? And what I've noticed for myself is this desire to let go of anything that still feels performative. I'm someone who really, really values authenticity, and I want to continue to become a deeper, more authentic version of myself. And I think it's really, it's really easy to fall into this trap of letting the outside world shape you in a way where you're looking externally for how you should show up. I think that was the biggest lesson I learned from my jewelry company is I kind of, I looked to the world to tell me what kind of boss I should be. I stopped creating from a place of joy and expression, and it became really easy for me to create new jewelry collections based on what I knew customers would like and what people were asking for. And I'm finding that now I'm kind of looking and evaluating this aspect of performance in myself more in personal life and just who I am as a person. I think that I have a habit of, instead of expressing what I want, I first look to others, like what works for you. Or even when I'm sitting down to create an episode of this podcast or write something, I can so easily share or from this place of, what do I think you want from me versus what excites me to share. And so moving forward, that's what I'm really focusing on is what excites me, what lights me up, what do I creatively want to express versus deciding what I think you want from me. Because the reality is, I truly don't know what you want. I'm not in your mind. And I think that it's more sustainable and more fun to just show up and share from this place of what I'm feeling just really energized and excited by. And I think this is a great example of not making any actionable shifts necessarily. I'm not starting a new project. I've already done that. I have this podcast. I've been recording weekly. It's about making that shift, that subtle, nuanced shift of what do I want to share versus what do I think you want me to share. And I'm excited to see where that takes me, both here and just in life in general, of how can I deepen my relationships with people when I'm sharing myself first versus kind of always trying to accommodate or compromise before anyone even asks me to. This is such a deep, deeply ingrained pattern in me. It's even in my birth chart with my south node in Libra and my north node in Aries, that Libra south node really is my comfort zone of like, finding that balance, like the symbol of Libra are the two scales. And it's about finding kind of what works for the collective. And that's what feels kind of comfortable for me versus Aries energy. Aries is the first sign in the zodiac. And it's really about being independent, taking initiative, like being a leader and being the one to go first. And that's what is kind of uncomfortable for me in general. And right now, I feel like I'm being called to step into that role of like, let me lead, let me say, this is what I want to do first. If you've been listening for the past few episodes, you might know that I'm starting to really focus on writing and sharing more of that side of myself. First, I kind of shared the desire to be an author, and I shared that I'm working on a novel. And then I shared some of my writings, some essays back from 2024 that I wrote and sent out in a newsletter. And this year, I'm really excited to work on my novel, hopefully finish my first draft, and start on the second draft, and just see where that takes me and what happens if I maintain and prioritize a consistent writing practice. And also with that, a few years ago, I was part of an online writing group, and I found it to be really nourishing. We met once a week, and we started off the sessions by just checking in and talking about what we're working on, maybe what we're struggling with. And then we wrote for an hour working on our own projects, and then came together at the end to kind of close. And I've found myself really missing that space and that energy ever since I've left. And, you know, honoring that North node Ares energy and that leadership energy, I really want to create that space again, both for myself, but for anyone who might be feeling like they want a little support or they want connection as they write and they explore their writing practice. So I'm going to be starting that this year. I'm hoping that it'll meet once a week on Wednesday mornings. If that's something that you feel called to, I would encourage you to sign up for my newsletter because I'll share more details there. Or you can also send me a message on Instagram, and I can add you to the list for this writing circle. You don't necessarily have to be on the whole newsletter list. If you'd prefer, you can just DM me, and I'll just add you to the list of people that might be interested in this writing circle. I'm imagining it to be a weekly meeting, but something that you can just drop into when it feels right for you. So you don't have to commit to meeting every week. You can really find what works for you. So if you're interested in that, either sign up for my newsletter, and I'll send out more details there, or send me a message on Instagram. My Instagram is at Kim Kogane. That's K-I-M-K-O-G-A-N-E. And I'll add you to the list. So writing and this podcast are kind of going to be the things that are front and center for me, especially career-wise. And other things I want to focus on this year are really just maintaining the habit and the routines that I know really nourish me and serve me. So getting out into nature, going on a walk every day, that's really important to me. Maintaining my cadence of Pilates and strength training to support my body. And I'm really excited to just keep deepening the roots that I have here. I want to really work on making my home even more cozy and bringing in new decor that really resonates. One of the things I haven't done yet, I haven't set up any bookshelves, and so all of my books are still in boxes from when I moved, and that's been kind of making me sad. I feel really, really held when I can just have all of my books out on display and look at them and kind of feel their presence. So I think like one of the big projects I want to do is to find the right bookshelf or set of bookshelves to bring in and add those to my space. So I'm really excited to continue this slower pace of life to focus on sharing my voice through writing and through this podcast, taking care of my mind and my body through getting outside in nature and working out in a way that doesn't feel pressured or too stressful. I want my body to feel really supported, and I want to continue to be able to do the things that I love as I get older. And so that's a little bit of what I'm bringing into this year and what I'm kind of focusing on, and what I'm committing to, and kind of what is a mid-year refresh for me. And I hope that you are able to really take time to pause and know that you don't need to reinvent yourself. You are perfect just as you are, and the time, this time to pause and reflect is really just to help you get clear on who you want to be, who you want to become, and what feels right for you. So I really encourage you to kind of quiet all of the noise that's out there, and just really take what works for you, and leave what doesn't. You don't have to opt in to everything that exists out there. And if you're kind of feeling stuck in the foggy middle, or you're feeling exhausted from having to always figure it out alone, maybe you're just wanting a little extra support. I want to invite you to maybe explore the Shoreline private coaching sessions. They are weekly coaching sessions with me over six months, and you can find more information or schedule a time to learn more and chat with me on my website, www.kimkogane.com. That's www.kimkogane.com. And that's where I'll leave you today. I hope you take good care while the waves carry you closer, and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Welcome to today's episode. It's the last episode of 2025, and I'm feeling really excited to kind of put this year behind me and move forward. It's been quite an intense year for me. One of the most, if not the most challenging one with my dad passing away and just navigating so many different life changes and moving through the grief. And it feels like this whole year has been a lot of letting go, a lot of grieving, not only losing my dad, but just losing parts of myself and shifting out of an old identity. And as I look forward to 2026, I've been thinking a lot about how I might want to show up differently. What do I want to create in my future? And what am I really ready to kind of put to rest? And I've been thinking a lot about creativity and the writing process and showing up to my writing. I shared a couple weeks ago that I'm working on a novel and just that writing is something that's really important to me. So as we kind of spend time in the quiet and close out the year, I thought it might be fun to actually share some of my writing with you. So today, I'm going to share five pieces. They're old newsletters actually from 2024, but they're five different short personal essays that I just really feel like I want to document and to share with you. So that's what this episode is, and I hope you enjoy them. Let's get to it. Essay number one, In My Kittens and Crutches Era. I'm in my kittens and crutches era. You might be wondering what kittens have to do with crutches. The short version is that my cat went into labor the night before I had ankle surgery, and I welcomed two kittens and two crutches into my life simultaneously. The long version of how this all happened is quite a story in itself, and maybe I'll tell you someday. Right now, I want you to join me on another journey. Going into surgery, I had an idea of how it would go, and a plan for how I was going to heal and get back on my feet, literally, in record time. It was a great attempt on my part to try and maintain control of a situation that was completely out of my hands. I spent the next two weeks in bed, and due to the layout of my house, couldn't leave my bedroom even if I'd wanted to. That meant I couldn't take my dog, Koshee, on her walks, and I couldn't even get myself a glass of water. I had to ask someone to stay with me. Asking for help for even the tiniest of things pained me. I felt like a burden and completely useless. I had brand new kittens that I couldn't see or take care of. Not only could I not be a caretaker, but I was the one who needed looking after. I had been stripped of my independence and autonomy. It was as if the universe placed me in a perfectly designed hell that brought all of my deepest unhealed wounds to the surface. I felt like life was passing me by while I was stuck in bed counting down the hours until it was time to start a new day. I had nothing to look forward to other than my post-op appointment in two weeks. I wanted so desperately to be free, but no amount of pushing or willing could change the fact that my body needed time to heal. So, I surrendered. I stopped trying to do too much and embraced my newfound slower pace. I stopped apologizing anytime I had to ask for food or water. I let someone else take care of Koshi. I tried to just let my body do its thing. I spent time dreaming of my cast coming off and all the things I would do. I decided my post-op appointment would be the solution to all my problems. It wasn't. When the nurse took my cast off, my ankle felt vulnerable and exposed, like a crab without its shell. I immediately wished I could go back to just being in bed with my ankle protected. I didn't feel ready to take the next step, but I had to keep going anyway. Healing, whether it's physical, emotional, or spiritual, is not a linear path. It's more like a spiral. I've heard this more times than I can count, but I think I'm only now understanding what it means. You may visit familiar themes or wounds, but you never go backward. You can't really, because you're always collecting new perspectives and uncovering new bits of your inner wisdom. So here I am in the middle of this particular healing voyage, what I'm calling my kittens and crutches era. The kittens are starting to take their first steps. I'm amazed at how they're able to follow their instincts so easily. I've noticed that they don't push too hard. They test their strength taking a few steps before toppling over and deciding they need a nap. They always honor what their little bodies need. I'm not unlike the kittens right now. Some days, I'll wake up and feel good enough to test out the strength of my ankle, walking around the block with my crutches. Then, others, my ankle will be sore and my body craves being horizontal. It's an ebb and flow, kind of like the tide flowing in and out. The kittens and I are getting stronger every day, even if it doesn't feel like it. I know that soon this time will be a distant memory, and walking will be something I take for granted again. What I hope to take from this time is that there's power in slowing down. I want to remember what it feels like to fully trust my body, to guide me, and that like the kittens we also carry everything we need with us. All that wisdom we search for outside ourselves is waiting for us in the stillness, in the quiet. All it asks of us is that we are courageous enough to listen. This essay was originally published on May 14th, 2024. Gosh, reading that essay was so interesting. I haven't really gone back and read it since I sent it out in my newsletter almost over a year and a half ago. And it does feel like it was so long ago and so much has changed. The kittens are over a year and a half now. I'm able to walk around on my ankle. The kitten's mom has since been adopted by my friend. I live in a different house. So there have been so many changes. And it actually felt really good to kind of read about this snapshot in my life and think about all of the lessons I learned and the slowing down. And I'll admit, since my ankle got better, I really have been just pushing and doing more. And I forgot about that time when really I was forced to slow down and how beautiful and magical that can be. So it was really interesting to go back and read that for you. All right, let's move on to the next essay. This one I sent out a week after I sent out the one about my kittens. And essay number two is called, I was about to delete everything. You almost didn't get last week's email. It was an hour before my newsletter was scheduled to be sent. I was making myself coffee when I fell into a complete panic spiral. This particular spiral is not foreign to me. It tends to show up when I'm doing something I really care about, or when I'm feeling like I'm sharing too much. Spiral in motion, I sat down in front of my computer. Convinced that hitting delete was the right call, I took a sip of coffee and allowed the caffeine to fuel my intrusive thoughts. There's no dramatic twist. You already know how the story ends. I didn't hit delete, the email got sent. My panic spiral was telling me the email wasn't ready. It wasn't good enough. It wasn't newslettery enough. Such a wonderfully vague critique. I felt like the most lackluster version of myself. Was my writing any good? Did what I have to say even matter? I was deep in the trenches of self-doubt. I sat there in front of my computer, my finger hovering over the delete key. I started to think about all the effort I'd put into this newsletter, the time I'd spent writing, how much fun I had designing a new template, and thinking about the experience someone might have. Then, something shifted. I stopped thinking about how well received my writing would be. The critical thoughts washed away as another voice came forward. It was a younger version of me emerging as if she was showing me a piece of art she was proud of. I remembered how important writing was to me, how important it still is to me now. In the end, my desire to not disappoint that little me was stronger than my desire to preserve some sort of cool image or comfy cocoon I'd created for myself. It can feel scary to choose to reveal the softer sides of ourselves in a world where we're expected to have it all together. I imagine that's how a cat feels when they expose their belly to you. But here's the thing. Being vulnerable is a practice, and I was simply out of shape. I had been hiding away for so long that I forgot the art of sharing my true self. I'm so glad I followed through on sharing my email because you met me with such kindness and softness. You reminded me how good it can feel to show up and share the truest part of myself. I hope that you remember to share more of your true self with the world because we need it. And if you don't, that's okay too. Maybe you need some deep cocooning. Wherever you're at, I hope you can take time to champion the dreams of younger you because you deserve for them to come true. This essay was originally published on May 22, 2024. As I kind of go back and read this piece, it's interesting because I still have all of those same feelings when it's time for an episode of this podcast to go live, or when I hit publish on a substack essay, it does feel really exposing and vulnerable and kind of scary. And I think this is a really wonderful reminder for me of why writing is important to me and who I'm actually doing this for, which is that younger version of me that really wanted to be a writer. And I love that part about her kind of showing me her art. And when I think about it that way, it kind of becomes less scary. So I'm really glad I was able to go back in and read this one. And I hope that you got something out of it. Essay number three. Are you like me? I always skip to the end of the story. I've never had an affinity for crazy plot twists. I always look a movie up on IMDB before watching. And these days, I prefer to rewatch a familiar show over seeing something new. Maybe that's why I love rom-com so much. There's a certain comfort in knowing the story will be tied up in a nice little bow by the end. When I was younger, I remember getting to the part of a book where, as a reader, you don't like what's happening. You know those parts that make you squirm in your seat as you read them, or when you want to yell at the main character and tell them they're making the wrong choice. I couldn't stand discomfort, so I would skip ahead. Once I found a moment of resolution, I would exhale knowing it was all going to work out and resume reading. When I felt myself starting to get squirmy, I would think about what was coming next, and that got me through the uncomfortable part of the story. So much of the work I've been doing these last four years has been about embracing the unknown. I'd like to say that it's become easier to live in the moment and trust in what is yet to come, but I'm still very much a work in progress. I still try to control my path and my life. I try to read ahead in my own story, creating a vision for what I think I want and working backwards until I have a blueprint to follow. What I've learned is the desire to know what's next is the exact obstacle in my way. It may feel comforting to read ahead in a story, but trying to control my life leads me to feeling exhausted and discontent. The read ahead philosophy doesn't really apply to life. When I think about what I love most about romcoms, it's not their predictability. I find their formulaic nature comforting, but what keeps me watching is the hopeful feeling it gives me that life can feel magical all the time. If life is a movie, maybe we're not meant to be the viewer. As a viewer, we get to see exactly what is meant to happen in a romcom, but the characters have no idea what is around the corner. The lead doesn't know that the neighbor they hate is their love interest. They can't predict the meet cute waiting for them at their coffee shop. Even the scenes where they're at home doing nothing feel meaningful, and they feed the plot in some way. I wonder what it might feel like to treat life more like being in a movie versus watching a movie. What if we were like the character in the movie and truly experiencing each moment instead of being the viewer trying to predict what will happen? Trying to be the main character is not a new idea, but perhaps it can be a good reminder that being present is the best change we can make in our lives. As humans, I think we naturally spend a lot of time thinking about what has already happened and what will happen next. It's how we're designed, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's a great skill to have, but that's not necessarily where the magic lives. The magic is in the not knowing. Lately, I've been feeling pretty frustrated with where I'm at in this season of life. I had a timeline all planned out for how I would heal from surgery. By now, I thought my ankle would be ready for long walks, but it's actually quite the opposite. It needs me to do less, to be softer in my healing process. So, I've been throwing myself a lot of pity parties and trying to let go of the expectations I had for this summer. Some days, I love the slower pace. Other days, I feel trapped in my house and like everyone is moving forward without me. Healing can feel lonely. When I take a moment to think about how this would play out in a movie, it would be a montage of all the days at home blended together with a good soundtrack. It's the bit in between big plot points, which is still important and moves the story along. Maybe there's even some magic to be found. This essay was originally published on June 6, 2024. Essay number four. What is your guilty pleasure? I have an obsession with looking at houses online. Opening up my Zillow app and perusing new listings while sipping coffee has become part of my morning ritual. I'll look at a listing and try to picture myself there. How would I arrange the furniture? What decor would I need? Which nearby coffee shop would become my spot? If I moved to New York, what would the New York version of me be like? I love the potential of a fresh start, a clean slate. With every new listing, there's a little glimmer of hope that a dramatic move might inspire a new, better me. It's a fun way to give imagination creative control for a bit. And 99% of the time, I close the app feeling grateful to live where I do. Truthfully, I'm not sure I would even like New York me that much. Then there's the other 1% of the time. Lately, this seemingly innocent hobby of mine has taken on a different flavor. Looking at other homes has activated what I like to call my what's wrong attention. It's what happens when I lose my feeling of gratitude, and I focus all my attention on everything I don't like about my place of residence. There are the smudges on the walls that won't go away no matter how many times I clean them, and the fact that I hate having to street park my car. It feels like watching a beautiful magazine image of my home slowly photoshopped to reveal all its imperfections. Over time, this what's wrong attention starts to seep into other areas of my life. I feel myself becoming cranky and annoyed by everything. It turns out, if you try hard enough, you can find an endless stream of things to complain about. In a rock bottom moment, I dove into the archives of my camera roll, letting my nostalgia add a little extra sparkle to each memory. And before I knew it, I was in full-blown, how did I end up here mode, questioning all of the decisions I've ever made. I yearned for other eras of my life, times when I felt like a shinier version of myself. Then one night, I had a dream that I was moving. I was in what was supposed to be my new home and I felt terrible. I remember crying in my dream because I didn't want to move. I couldn't imagine leaving a place that has been my sanctuary during a time of deep healing. The new place felt dingy and lacking compared to what I had. When I woke up, I felt so relieved that it was only a dream. That dream shook me out of whatever funk I was in. I started to see my house in a new light. I remembered how much I loved that my bedroom feels like staying in a nice hotel or how much I love how much natural light I get even on the grayest of days. I stopped focusing on what was wrong and started to remember everything that was right. I realized that I wasn't unhappy at all. I actually really love my home and the quiet life it offers me. While it may not be what I had planned for myself, it serves me quite well. I remembered why I decided to close my jewelry company almost four years ago and why I promised to listen to my body and let go of the hustle culture conditioning. I think the lesson here is that we may not always know what will make us happy, but if we keep chasing little moments of joy, we may stumble upon a life even better than we could have imagined. Oh, and caffeine and Zillow don't go well together. This essay was originally published on June 12, 2024. Essay number five. Beaches, bonfires, and bullshit. Lana Del Rey said it best. I got that summertime, summertime sadness. Every June light clockwork, I fall into a pit of sadness. I start to panic about having plans and making the most of my summer. My future happiness and success are now solely based on how many beach bonfires I've been invited to. If you're wondering, the answer is and always has been none. In fact, I'm not sure I even know beach bonfire people. It's a rigged game. My entire life starts to unravel as I reflect on every wrong turn I've ever made. Suddenly, I'm looking at apartments for rent in Paris and plotting my escape from this terrible bonfireless life, wondering how I'll fit a dog and four cats into my suitcase. This year, I actually caught on to this thought game before I fell too deep in the pit. I started to notice the cyclical nature of my thoughts and how uncreative they were. Why is it always a bonfire at the beach that I need to be invited to? While awareness is a helpful first step, it doesn't make the intrusive thoughts go away. It can dull the pain, but sometimes being cut by a dull blade hurts even more. Conceptually, I know this is part of my annual cycle. I know that once the end of July hits, a switch will flip and I will become a social butterfly for a month. While this awareness can be helpful, what I really need to do is move through the feelings. Growth comes from embodiment. I remember a question my therapist would ask me sometimes when I was frustrated and feeling stuck. She would say to me, What are you being called to learn? This question has stuck with me over the years, acting as my North Star during difficult times. I like to think that my experiences are constantly shaping me like a potter molds their clay. It feels too sad to think that life is completely meaningless. My mom used to tell me everything happens for a reason, which is probably the least helpful thing you can tell someone going through a difficult time. While I don't believe that every little thing is faded, I do believe that when reflecting back, we can give context to our experiences and recognize how they've shaped us into who we've become. I think I prefer the approach of the first question because it's led by curiosity versus being fed a silver lining I didn't ask for or want. It's empowering to believe that I get to choose what the events of my life mean. I'm not sure why things happen the way they do. I can't make sense of all the horrors of the world and why tragedy strikes when it does. But I'm trying to remain curious about how this season is shaping me. This year has been hard in ways I couldn't imagine. It feels like a clearing in a way. A season of tough love and forced growth. In a time when we are constantly being perceived and aware of that perception, it takes courage to step into the truest version of ourselves. Living in authentic and vulnerable life isn't for the faint of heart. I've been having moments where I have to tell myself to cut the bullshit. I have to be brutally honest with myself and get clear about what I want, instead of what I want to want. As much as I'd love to be the carefree, bonfire-loving version of myself, I'm not going to force it. I'm done chasing what I think will make me happy. I'm learning and growing and crying a lot if I'm being honest. There are even times when I'm excited about who I'm becoming. I know I'll be okay even if it doesn't feel like it at times, and soon it will be time to welcome in an entirely different season. In the meantime, I'll keep hunting for small moments of joy while life molds me into its next masterpiece. This essay was originally published on July 16th, 2024. Wow, reading this last one, it's funny because at the time, I remember feeling like what I was going through was the hardest thing that I'd ever done. And it's funny because this year has been even more challenging and even more devastating in a lot of ways. But it's also been a clearing, and a lot of this still rings true to me. I'm still me, and I still have moments of feeling like, oh, I wish I could be this way, or why don't I want this, and why am I at where I'm at? And I have to remind myself that it's not about performing or becoming the version I want myself to want to be. It's about honoring what feels true. So that's where I want to leave this. I feel really, really honored that you took the time to listen to my writing, and it feels really special to share this work with you, and I'm excited to keep writing and keep sharing, and keep moving forward in 2026. I hope you have a wonderful close to 2025, and take good care while the waves carry you closer. Know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello and welcome. Today, I want to check in with you and just share what's been going on with me and what's been kind of coming up. So let's get into it. I will say that over the last few weeks, life has felt really heavy for me. There's been lots of different kinds of grief experiences. And this one is definitely familiar, and it's one that can be kind of confusing to navigate because there's not necessarily an outward trigger or something like a memory or like intense sadness necessarily. It's more that I'm just carrying with me this heavy feeling where it just, it's hard to kind of get up and out of bed and everything just feels really hard. And I think it's a combination of grief and grief during a season that can be really family focused and really joy focused. And I'm not really having that experience necessarily. It's also that it's December and where I'm at, it's extremely gloomy and the days are short. The sun sets around 4, 4.30. And so the evenings are just really dark, and it adds to that heavy feeling. So life has been feeling really heavy. I feel like I've just been feeling everything. I kind of feel like I can sense every little bump, every wave, every little energetic blip, and it can be really overwhelming at times. I've definitely, over the last couple of weeks, have found myself feeling frustrated that I'm sensitive and wanting to kind of not feel as much, not feel as deeply. And that can be challenging when you're not able to hold compassion and acceptance for who you are. And there's a lot of gifts that come with sensitivity. And in this physical world, it can be a challenge as well. So I found myself just kind of wanting to check out, or just wishing that I could move through the world, move through my day-to-day without just feeling every little thing. You know, the intensity of being in traffic, or like going to the grocery store and feeling all of the stress and the chaos, or being really sensitive even to like the changes in the weather, and having kind of, you know, flare-ups with my skin. And it just is endless. The feelings are endless. And it's funny that I kind of was wishing that I could feel less, because a few days ago, I went through an experience where I woke up one morning, and I just kind of felt numb and checked out. And that lasted for a few days, where I just felt like not really in my body, and just kind of like, I couldn't really feel anything. Like, I knew that the heaviness was there. I knew that I was not feeling my best, and I also just kind of felt nothing at the same time. And what those few days of numbness taught me is that I don't want to live that way. I don't want to feel nothing, that I actually do want to feel deeply. And that's what it really means to be alive for me, is to just really, really get into the juicy parts of life and feel it all, feel the moon cycles, feel the chaos, feel the joy, the sadness, all of it. And I, when I kind of was able to move through that checked out feeling and kind of come back to this sensitive, deep feeling part of me, I could just see it in such a different way. And I don't know if I will ever kind of wish that I was different again. I feel like it really taught me like, wow, this is, this is in fact like what my soul asked for. And I'm so grateful that I am this way. So that was a little lesson that came to me this week. I think that part of the reason why everything's been feeling heavy and I've kind of just been craving slow, I've been really tired lately and just wanting to move less and just kind of be at home in my cozy safe space. And I think it's really because I'm going through a period of just deep letting go, deep shedding, kind of visiting some old patterns that are holding me back. And when you're going through this big energetic work, you may not have anything, you know, in your day to day, in your outside world, that you can point to as to like why you might be feeling tired, but know that your inner landscape is just as important. And all of this energetic work is, you know, is really important and valuable. And it requires like some deep support and self care, which can look like, you know, slowing down, resting more, just taking time away from the noise and the busyness and the chaos that's around us. And that's really where I'm at right now. I've been really thinking about what patterns in my life are no longer serving me. How do I want to show up as the new year begins, but also kind of as I'm heading into the one-year anniversary of my dad passing away, and these new roles that I may be stepping into, I really want to really be conscious of how I'm showing up to my life going forward. And I think sometimes that requires doing some reflection, looking back, thinking about, okay, like, what don't I want anymore, and how do I want to be? And so this feeling of grief is not just the grief of missing my dad, which I miss him so much. He was and is such an important person to me. So I'm grieving him. I'm grieving our relationship in the physical world. And I'm also grieving the person I used to be and the life that I had before this huge change and shift. And grieving our old identities, our previous versions, is really important. Those patterns we've developed, whatever we let kind of come through, that served us really well and got us to a certain point. And I think that the grieving process is really honoring where you've come from and how you're kind of moving on your journey. And I do think it's really valuable and important to take time to just kind of grieve, maybe that version of yourself or that identity that you used to hold. I remember when I was going through the process of closing my jewelry company, I really, it felt like losing a part of myself. And I really did have to sit and just grieve that and let go of not only what I created but the person it required me to be. And I think throughout that process when I was like journaling, I did, I wrote kind of like a eulogy for that part of me, and I really wanted to honor her. And I think that can be really cathartic and a great way to kind of release and to capture that moment in time. This time around, as I kind of let go, it feels a little bit more nuanced. There is that very distinct before and after with my father's death, but also the changes. Some of the changes came really quickly and intensely. But also there's kind of this more nuanced shifting that's happening. It almost feels kind of like the tide, the tide coming in or going out, and you're just getting those little waves. And slowly, you know, the water gets closer and closer to the shore, or slowly it moves further and further away from the shore. And that's kind of the phase that I feel like I'm in right now of like, little things will pop up and be here for a moment, and I kind of can work through it and lay it to rest, and then the next thing will pop up. And I know that all of these patterns coming up, all of these experiences are shaping me into this, whatever this next version of me that's unfolding. One of the biggest pieces I'm being called to let go of is really my ego and this sense that my value is placed on what I do or what I achieve. And that is something that has been driving me for forever, for as long as I can remember. And it feels both really right and true to let that go. And I can recognize that that mechanism isn't serving me anymore. I will not get to where I want to go by doing more, hustling, busying myself, giving more. That's just not where I'm going. I really, in this next version, want to, one, see myself as my own person and see that I am in hold, that I am just inherently worthy as I am. And it doesn't matter, you know, what I achieve, if I have a really amazing, flashy career, or if I don't do anything. And so that's what I've been, one of the things I've been really working through is just kind of letting go of this idea of like, hustle, do more, create more, push more, make things go faster. And I'm trying to just settle in and say to myself, you know, hey, success is just doing what you love and showing up to the projects and the things that bring you joy and fulfillment. So that's kind of what I'm wanting to take with me as we move forward is just this idea of living really richly, of showing up to what's important to me, and letting go of this proving, achieving energy. Because to be honest with you, it's pretty exhausting, and I don't recommend it. I think, too, that focusing on achieving and doing and producing and creating, it doesn't really align with the desire to live on a deeper level, to experience all of the deep, juicy feelings. Like those two things cannot really coexist. That hustling, achieving energy, to me, feels very surface level, which is, you know, I'm not placing a judgment by saying it's surface level or superficial at all. It is one way of being, and I know that my path is to dive deeper. And it's so, just so magical and aligned that it's coming up now. So a little bit of a tangent. Every year, I do a tarot spread around my birthday, where I pick a card for each month, and then a card that represents the overall theme of the year for me. And I looked last week at what my card was for the month of December. And it's the whale card from the Wild Unknown deck, which I love that deck so much. It's a really approachable way to enter into tarot. And I just love all of the animals and descriptions. The author has also put in kind of what it looks like when this card is in balance, what it looks like when the energy is out of balance, and how you can bring it into balance. And so last week, I looked at what my card was, just being like, oh, I wonder what's for December. And I pulled the whale card, which is all about this desire to dive deeper. It's about finding kind of profound peace and tapping into ancient wisdom. And in the description, it talks about kind of not being afraid of emotional expression or traversing difficult circumstances or needing to overcome challenges. It's this card that holds like a deep wisdom and a deep peace and doesn't fear the future or difficulty. And it just has this beautiful calm and power to it. And I just thought, wow, like, this is so timely. It feels like this is exactly where I'm at and what I'm craving. And I just love when I get those little reassurances, that, yes, there is something outside of myself that I'm connected to that is guiding me. And also with this card to bring into balance, it says regular self-care, which is exactly what I've been talking about and said that that's kind of what is needed right now for me while I navigate all of this heaviness. So it just felt like that card really just tied everything up in a neat little bow, and yeah, that's kind of, that's my update for you. I'll leave you with a few reflections that I'm taking with me in case you might find them helpful. So the first one is everything you're feeling has value. Whatever it is that's coming up for you, it's meant to, and it's valuable, and so important to feel it. So it's okay to take time to just feel your feelings. The second one is connection is everywhere. I think when we allow ourselves to be open, we may find that there's connection in unexpected places. You might have a really nice conversation with someone at the grocery store, or you might run into a neighbor, or you might feel really connected to nature on your walk or whatever it is. Just know that there's opportunity for connection everywhere. And the last one is you're always moving forward. Even when you don't think you are, every experience, every moment is propelling you forward on your path. So just know that and trust that. And if you'd like to explore the themes coming into your life or you need some support navigating an in-between season, I just invite you to consider the Shoreline Sessions. So the Shoreline Sessions are a private coaching container where we meet weekly for six months as you navigate your next becoming. The greatest transformation often comes from subtle shifts in perspective, getting curious about what may lie beneath the surface, and having the space to regularly check in with your inner landscape. So if any of this resonates with you, I would encourage you to schedule a clarity reading with me. You can find more information about the Shoreline Sessions and how to book a clarity reading on my website at kimkogane.com. That's www.kimkogane.com. And lastly, if you're enjoying the Shoreline podcast, I would invite you to leave a rating or review wherever you listen to podcasts. This will help more people find the Shoreline, and it helps me feel more connected to you. So thank you so much for being here, and I hope you take good care while the waves carry you closer. Your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Before we dive into today's episode, I want to share The Shoreline Sessions with you. The Shoreline Sessions are a one-on-one private coaching container where we meet weekly for six months. I'm sharing this because as we close out the year and start to look ahead, you might be wondering what's next for you. I'm offering free clarity readings for anyone who might be interested or just feeling called to kind of explore where you're at right now and what you might want to call in next. Those clarity readings are a short tarot reading, and then we can kind of talk about what sessions could look like together. If you're interested in learning more about The Shoreline sessions or booking a clarity reading with me, you can go to my website, www.kimkogane.com. That's www.kimkogane.com. Hello and welcome. If this is your first time listening, I'm so glad you found me and I'm so glad you're here. And if you're returning, I'm really happy that you came back. Today, I want to share with you something that feels really, really vulnerable and kind of scary to share. You know, I'm very much in a season of transition, which is really what The Shoreline is all about. And part of that transition is kind of deciding where I'm going next and what I want for kind of the next phase of my life, the next iteration of of my career. For those who are new, I started a jewelry company when I was 24, and I built that for 10 years, and I decided to close it in 2020. And since then, I've kind of been in a season of trying things, exploring, really figuring out what's next. And I hadn't really landed on one kind of path until, really until I was hit with losing my dad and going through an intense amount of grief. And grief is one of those things that really, it forces you to get really clear on what's important to you. And everything else, that's kind of like a maybe or a half-interest or whatever it is, it all just kind of falls away. And from this season of grief that I'm in, I was able to get really clear on what I feel called to do and what I want to build in my career. And that's really to share my voice and to share stories with the world. And that's kind of how I landed on bringing the podcast back. It felt really right and important, even if it feels sometimes difficult to show up to or scary because I'm not sure what I'm going to say or what's coming out. But it feels really right. And the other part of sharing my voice, the sharing the stories, is that I want to write novels. And in fact, I'm working on my first novel, and I have been for a few years. And I don't think that I've shared that here because it's something that feels really tender for me. And it's something that I've never done before, and I'm kind of just fumbling my way through. So let's go back to kind of how that came to be. About, I want to say like three-ish years ago, I was part of an online writing group. And up until that point, I really had focused on writing stories about my life, writing kind of pieces, essays that were meant to inspire others or help others in some way. I'd never really ever intended to write fiction. I thought like eventually, I would write some sort of book that was in the memoir space. So I was in this writing group and we were kind of doing quiet writing time and I was feeling really stuck on what to write next. I had worked on a guided journal and completed that. And I was like, okay, like, what am I going to work on? Like, where am I meant to go? And these characters kind of came to me. And it really just was a moment that struck me of like, oh my gosh, I've never tried to write fiction, but it's something that's like really intriguing to me. So I spent some time really developing the characters and getting to know them and trying to see like, okay, who are they? What stories are they bringing to me? And from there, I was able to kind of create a rough outline of the story. And from there, I started drafting, and I wanted to complete my first draft. I got probably, I want to say like a third of the way through, and I realized that I needed to go back to my outline and kind of make it a little bit more detailed and just dive a little bit deeper into the story. It felt like I didn't have all of the pieces yet. So I stopped the first draft and I started working on the outline again and got it to a really detailed, great place and then started drafting my first draft for the second time. And that's where I'm at now. And this is something that I've really worked on sporadically, and I've gone for months at a time without even thinking about it. But the characters just keep coming back to me. Like if I don't sit down and write and visit the story, they'll start to come to me in my dreams, or I'll hear bits of dialogue on a walk, or I'll kind of feel into the pain or the struggle of one of the characters. And so it's something that's really kind of woven itself into my life. And I think it feels scary to share because I've never written a novel before. I don't really know what my process is. And a lot of times, I feel like an imposter. And I've been really inconsistent with it up until now. And I wasn't really sure if it was something that could ever come to be. And the reason I'm sharing is because it's something that's really important to me, but also it just feels like the right time to kind of bring this to life and to really say like, this is what I want for myself. I want to write these stories. I have other stories that are kind of calling to me as well. And in a lot of ways, this career path makes so much sense. I don't know if you're familiar with The Artist's Way at all, but The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, it's one of those kind of staples for creatives and for artists. And in that, she talks about kind of, I think she calls it like the shadow artist or the shadow career. And very much so, jewelry was that for me. I never intended on having a creative career, but it kind of found me, and my jewelry company made a lot of sense because it was creative, but it also was like a business, and I could, you know, root myself in being an entrepreneur, and that made sense. But it also was that, it was a place for me to hide, so I didn't have to face this part of me that really wanted to be a writer, because I could say, hey, look, like, I'm a creative, I'm making things, I'm being artistic. So it was kind of that shadowy place for me to hide, and when that went away, you know, I was really forced to really sit with, sit with myself and what I wanted next. And in this transition time, I was really able to use a lot of the skills I developed in jewelry to keep going and to keep trying different things. And, you know, what I've learned through this space of being in grief is that, you know, there's a lot of things I could do, but there's only one thing I really want to do, and that's to share my voice, to share on here, to write and share the stories of my characters, and also to kind of guide people through these transition periods, through complexity, through this liminal space. It's something that feels like a true calling to me. Anyway, so I'm not sure how much of the actual story I want to share before it's done. I might continue to share my process, if that's of interest to you. But I just wanted to kind of call out that it's something I'm working on, and something I'm really committed to. And as we kind of look ahead into the future to a new year starting, you know, the one year anniversary of my dad passing is coming up. I'm really ready to call in what's next, and I want to look forward. And part of that is like building this next phase of my career and pursuing, you know, a writerly life and pursuing a career in writing. And I'm not sure what it's going to look like, but I want to take the steps anyway. And I think that's something that's a really important part of how we grow and evolve. You know, when you're in transition, when you're in an in-between space, you kind of have to let go of the shore that you're at and kind of go out to see without really knowing what's next. You have to step into the unknown and just trust that the path will reveal itself without having all of the pieces in place. That's part of the process. And, you know, you go through that phase of really letting go of what's comfortable, and you have to grieve whatever it is you're releasing. And then you're kind of like in that true in-between, where you're almost in just like a freefall, right? Like you can't see where you once were, but you're not really sure who you're becoming or what's coming up next. And you're really just in that juicy in-between, and you get to play, you get to explore. And as uncomfortable as it is to be in that space, it kind of becomes comfortable, and you get to embrace that there are so many possibilities that you get to explore. And then there comes a time where you're so comfortable in that space, and you realize it's time to move on. Maybe you have a moment of clarity, or you feel that spark, and you have to move forward. And I feel like that's a little bit where I am right now of like, okay, I see the vision. I have my north star of what I want. Now it's time to really go after it. And that can be really scary. I think it's scary to let go of what's comfortable, to say I've outgrown this version of me or this version of my life, and I'm going to leave what's good in pursuit of something, and I'm going to leave what's good in pursuit of something better. I think it's hard to be... I mean, all of the phases can be hard. But there's something really scary about calling in what you truly want and what your heart desires. And I think that we don't allow ourselves that opportunity to really express and share what our dreams are. And it's important. Even if they never come true, I think it's important to share them anyway and to say, like, this is what I want, especially in the career space. I think, like, when we're younger, you know, when you're a kid, people ask you, adults will ask you all the time, like, what do you want to be when you grow up? Like, what do you want to do when you're supposed to know? And then we stop asking ourselves that. And I think we should start asking again, because whatever it is that's calling to you that you can't let go of, it's there for a reason. I feel that deep in my soul, I, you know, as much as I never really intended to be a writer, it makes so much sense. Books have been my comfort and my escape for my entire life. Like I grew up reading so often, and I always had a book with me, and it felt like when the world was confusing or hard or scary, like I could always escape to a book. I could retreat into a story. The characters felt like comforting friends, and it's something that I continue to do now. I love reading a good book, and stories are so important to me. You know, like, why not go after that, right? And it does feel... It feels scary. I think I've said that probably 20 times now, but it's something that, you know, I don't yet know how to write a novel. I mean, I can conceptualize it. I can take classes. I can do my research, but everyone's process is unique, and I don't know what it looks like for me to sit down and write a novel yet. That's part of the discovery. But it doesn't mean I shouldn't show up to it, even when it's hard, even when I don't want to. And I think that the more I show up to it, the better it will become. And I think, more importantly, the more I'll feel fulfilled and aligned to my path. So sometimes you do just have to kind of take that leap without fully knowing and trust that you'll figure it out as you go. And who knows what will come from this pursuit, from this path. You know, maybe it'll be a dead end, and I'll see it through and scrap it. Maybe it'll lead me somewhere else, but I just have to trust that this is what I'm being called to right now. And it feels really exciting to share it with you, even when it feels a little bit vulnerable and it's something that is just, so tender to me. So I hope that you found this interesting. And yeah, if you want to know more about my writing and my process and how this story is evolving, just let me know because I'm happy to share more. I'm not sure what parts you might find interesting. But yeah, I'm open and I hope that you allow yourself to dream and to pursue those things that are really close to your heart and share them. Share them with those who are close to you, with strangers. You never know how sharing might shift. You know how you see yourself or how your path might evolve. So I would just encourage you to share what you're feeling called to as well. And that's really all I have for you today. I hope that you take good care while the waves carry you closer and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to today's episode. I want to explore magic and meaning as it relates to life. So, let's get right into it. I'm wondering if anyone's ever told you, you know, when you're going through a hard time, everything happens for a reason. I feel like that's something that can come up a lot, and it's something that I've experienced, you know, when I've been faced with adversity or difficulty in my life. And while that may be true, yes, everything happens for a reason. You can subscribe to that. I think it's less about, do you believe in that or do you not believe in that, and more about our natural inclination as humans to want to assign meaning to our existence. I think that's just an inherent part of what it means to be a human being. We want to believe that there is a deeper meaning to all of this. Or maybe you don't. I feel like I've definitely, when I was younger, I went through a phase where I was like, no, everything doesn't happen for a reason. Life is without meaning. Everything is just a coincidence. And you wake up, you get through the day, and then you do that over and over, and then it's over. And that is one school of thought, yes. And what I noticed when I was kind of in my phase of meaningless, random existence, I was unhappy. It wasn't exciting to feel that. And where I'm at now is like, I want to feel as much of joy and enchantment in my life as I possibly can. And, you know, I won't get into what your belief system is. And you can take this with a grain of salt and apply it to your own life or not as it relates to your belief system. But I kind of going back, like I do think it's important to give meaning to our lives and one way that we can do that is kind of by trying to bring in more magic and give it value. I think that's what I mean by creating meaning is like assigning value to some of what happens to us. And so what am I really talking about when I'm speaking about kind of magic and a magical life and enchantment? It's really that ability to connect to something greater than yourself. You know, it's that feeling of like going outside and like looking up at the sky and just feeling like awe and wonder and possibility and hope and just being able to kind of look out into the world and be like, wow, like there's, you know, what is this all about? Like, what am I meant to experience? And a lot of those feelings are ones that we were quite easily able to experience when we were younger. It's, you know, children really have like a natural curiosity and imagination. I can remember when I was a kid, I really didn't need, you know, that much stimulation. Like, I could go outside and give me a pile of dirt and I could tell you a whole story about it. And that ability, that curiosity, that creative thinking, it is available to us even in adulthood. And so when I'm speaking about magic, I'm just speaking about that, that ability to connect to something outside of ourselves, but also from within and to believe in some sort of higher power or just in that connection beyond just you. And then also that capacity to be imaginative, to be curious. And that really, really starts with creating that for ourselves. We have to create an environment where that can be cultivated. And so where I've kind of noticed that magic shows up for me, it really is in nature. And where this all kind of began and what got me thinking was like when I was out on a walk with my dog, Koshi. And our walks are really special. They started as a way for us to spend quality time together and for me to feel like I was closer to Koshi and to kind of get to know her world. And they've definitely evolved into something more. The biggest gift with Koshi is that she requires like pure presence from me. So when it's time for our daily walk, I put my phone away. I don't wear headphones and we just really go out and explore and it's her time. I let her lead and I just kind of observe like what's important to her, what inspires her. Lately, she's been really into getting all of the different smells and kind of getting her updates in the neighborhood. And it's through my attention and my presence with Koshi that I've been able to expand my capacity beyond that. So at the heart of our walks, it's still spending time together, getting outside, observing what is important to Koshi, what she's naturally drawn to. But then through that, I've been able to kind of expand and look at my surroundings and think about like, okay, like what is important to me? Like, what do I want to take in? And how can I feel connected to my surroundings? And so through our walks, I've been really able to, you know, get to know different flowers and like, look at the trees and how the seasons change. And, you know, sometimes we look for like, the different wildlife. I'll look at birds or squirrels or whatever it is. And the exciting part is that like, I get to create my own meaning to what I'm seeing. So I believe in signs, not coincidences. And I love to kind of look for patterns in nature. So whether that be seeing the same flower, seeing like an animal over and over, like I think it's really a fun way to kind of bring in that element of like magic, of surprise, like kind of like you're going on like a personal treasure hunt. And with these kind of like personal treasure hunts, there's a few things going on. On a somatic level, it's allowing me to kind of soothe my system by taking in what feels good, what feels nourishing. In my somatic training, we talk about that kind of our natural human instinct to look at what's wrong. It's called the what's wrong attention, and it's like built into how we're wired. And what's kept us kind of surviving for so long is to like constantly be looking for what's wrong, what's threatening, and it's we're just really hardwired for that. And it takes conscious effort to take in what's good. And I think it's great that we have this hardwiring system that we're built for survival. And I think we've evolved to a place where that doesn't need to be our primary focus. And we can kind of shift to start taking in more nourishing experiences. So on a somatic level, when I'm going on these walks, I'm really focusing on what engaging my senses, like what is joyful for me personally? What flowers do I like to look at? What does it smell like after it rains? What sounds am I hearing out in nature? All of these things, and I'm helping to kind of soothe my nervous system and like relax my body by taking in the good, by focusing my attention on what is good and nourishing. So that's what's happening in one sense. And then I think on a level deeper, it's also looking for these patterns, and through these patterns, we're able to kind of, it's almost like communicating with nature, with the universe, with our guides, whatever it is that you believe, like looking for these kind of repeated patterns are a great way to cultivate that relationship with whatever it is that you believe exists outside of yourself. And that's where really kind of the magic starts to come in, is when you assign meaning to what you're seeing, it brings that, it kind of brings it all to life. It brings that level of enchantment and delight and unknown and a little bit of like that mysticism. And, you know, that's where you can really, really feel yourself start to expand and elevate and just allow yourself to connect more to possibility. I think it's believing in magic or creating these magical moments, assigning meaning to what we're seeing or experiencing. It really allows us to think and create goals and visions beyond what we see as possible right now. And then slowly, what we didn't think was possible becomes possible. It also allows us to kind of dream and think more creatively. When you start to look for patterns out in the world, you're teaching your mind to think in a different way, to think in a non-linear way. And I think that's important. So, you know, there's a few different things happening. You're like soothing your system somatically. You're looking for patterns. You're communicating with your intuition, with your guides, with your surroundings, whatever it is. And then you're also like kind of building that trust with yourself and your path. I used to think that I kind of wanted to know how my life was going to go. Like, growing up, I was a chronic, read-ahead type of person, where if I didn't like what was happening in a book, I would just read ahead to see what happens. And then I would go back and like read it and be like, okay, like, it's all going to end the way that I want, or it's not going to end the way that I want, so I'm not going to finish reading it. And that's really not how life works, you know? You may know that you're going to go on a hike. You may know what this, you know, the end point will be, what you're looking for. But you don't know how many switchbacks there are going to be. You don't know when there are going to be hills, when you're going uphill or you're winding through the forest or whatever, wherever you're going. Like, that's kind of part of why you're going on a hike, is to experience the path. And you know your ultimate end point, but you don't really know how you're going to get there. And that's really like how, to me, how life is meant to be lived. Like you may have a greater vision or an end goal, but you're not really meant to know how to get there, and maybe why you're going the way you're going. And yet, our minds are built to always ask how and why. I think that's the biggest growth point that I work on in coaching is my desire to know why I'm doing something and how I'm going to get there. And I think that these practices of allowing kind of more magic into our lives is a way to kind of let that go and say like, okay, I don't need to know how and why. And I have these practices in place where I look for little bits that remind me that yes, I trust myself. I soothe myself and my nervous system by taking in what's good and nourishing. And it's fun. It's joyful. It brings a lightness to the everyday. So every day, it gets to be different, and you don't kind of fall into a space of predictability. And I think that's really important. It's great to be, you know, routine-based and to have habits. I'm a very consistent, routine person, and yet I want surprises. I want to go on a little treasure hunt. I want to see beyond what keeps me grounded and stable. I don't know if this is making any sense to you. I'm feeling a bit rambly, and yeah, I'm trying to give myself grace as I get back into sharing again, and I'm just showing up to this medium that is somewhat familiar, but there's lots of room for improvement. So maybe this has kind of been a winding path, and I wasn't really sure how we were going to get to where we were going, which I guess is just a really great metaphor to everything I've been talking about. And so I think before we kind of close, I want to talk about the ways in which magic can show up in our lives and what you can do to kind of invite more of it in. And I think for me, the biggest ways are what I already shared, connecting to nature and looking for signs and patterns, and then through angel numbers or aligned numbers. If you don't know what those are, they're just like a pattern of numbers. So an angel number is like 111222333 and so on. And they can also be patterns. Aligned numbers could be like 12125757, or maybe you just are really drawn to one specific number, and you look for that out in the world, and what it might mean to you. I think that's one way that I make driving more exciting because I really like hate being in the car, and I hate having to like drive around places. But I always look for aligned numbers on license plates, like on the car in front of me or on store signage or just out in the world. And I think it's just a really fun way. I think of it as a little nudge to like, oh, keep going, or a little hello, or just like, let's make this more fun. And it doesn't have to be deeper than that. It doesn't have to be like, oh, I saw 111. Everything is aligned and I need to document this. It can just be like, oh, I saw this, and it was really fun and exciting to see. And then I spoke a lot about how it shows up in nature. And I think it's fun to kind of create patterns for yourself, like, okay, like, what does it mean when I see this specific plant? Or, you know, maybe I'm really into spirals. And so I'm going to look for spirals out in the world, whether it's like on a sign or somewhere in nature. And like that means I'm on the right path or I'm working towards my vision or whatever meaning it is like you want to assign. Like that's the beauty of being human and having free will is that we get to decide what these things mean to us. And I think that's an important part of the conversation of like going back to what I said at the beginning, that everything happens for a reason. It's not like this, I have no agency in my life and like everything is just already decided. It's like you get to know, you get to create why something was meaningful, why a certain event had an impact on your life. And it's the same for these signs that you're looking for or magic. It's like, what does it mean to you? And why is it important to you? And how does it impact you? And everything happens for a reason can be like, oh, like this experience I had really shaped me into who I am now. And I'm really grateful for that because I like who I am now. Or I'm really happy with my growth and where I'm headed. And so I want you to maybe think about what magic do you want to create in your life? And what does that look like for you? Maybe it's the same as me and you want to go on walks and engage with nature, or maybe you engage with nature in a different way. Maybe you find magic through art or cooking or whatever it is. I really would encourage you to kind of think about what areas of your life could use a little magic and what are you looking to create and how can you tap into some of that imagination and possibility that maybe you felt at other points in your life. Because I think we all could use a little more magic and wonder in our lives. So I'll leave you there today. And I hope you take good care while the waves carry you closer. Your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Hello, and welcome to today's episode. Today, I want to talk about my journey with Tarot. So, lately, I've been kind of falling back in love with my Tarot practice, with my cards, and I thought it would be a really great time to just kind of share my journey and where I've been and kind of what's unfolded with the cards. So, in order to kind of start my Tarot journey, we'll go all the way back to 2017. I remember a friend at the time, I was over at her house and she had a set of Tarot cards, and I was vaguely familiar with Tarot, but I had never done a reading, I'd never had a reading done, and she was really excited about kind of sharing this particular deck and doing a reading for me and one of our other friends. And so she did a spread, and we were kind of going through the journey of that spread and going through the cards. And I just remember feeling just so seen, and like my, what I was going through at the time had just been so well summarized and articulated. And it just was really comforting to kind of see the cards reflect back to me what I had been feeling and what I had been going through. So after that experience, I bought a set of those cards, and I started to just play around and get to know the deck. And traditionally with tarot cards, you're not supposed to buy cards for yourself. They're supposed to be a gift from someone else. But I'm not really a super traditional person. And so I just really felt strongly that I wanted to buy the cards for myself and kind of get to know this medium and this practice. And so I really just dove in. I was so excited about it that I spent a lot of time at home just like shuffling through the cards, picking them, not necessarily doing like a proper reading or a spread, but just seeing what card would come out and reading about it in the guidebook and I just really wanted to like dive in to getting to know this deck. And one of the best things that I did in order to kind of learn all the cards was to create kind of like a journaling practice with it. So every day, I would pick a card and I would read about it. I would kind of write down the highlights of what it meant. And then I would just journal about like, did I feel like it was accurate? How is this applying in my life? And over time, picking cards day after day, I started to notice some patterns of like, I would pick sometimes I would pick the same card like two or three days in a row because that's really what I was going through. And I noticed like there were cards I would never see. And so it was really fun to kind of see the different themes and patterns that popped up. While I was kind of getting to know the deck, I also really was just excited to like share it because it really had a profound impact on my life. So I started to just bring my cards everywhere with me. And I would try to do readings for anyone who wanted them. It started with, you know, close friends to then like friends of friends. I remember even just like going and sitting at the bar by where my jewelry store was. And like I would even just do cards for, do readings for strangers or like let them pick a card. And it was just like really fun. And it was a really like easy way to connect with people. And it wasn't anything that I ever saw myself doing professionally or getting paid for. And I didn't even really seek out reading for others. It always just was a practice that I allowed people to come to me. I allowed it to be really flowy and it has been really flowy always. And yeah, it's just something that has always just brought me such joy and excitement to share with others. So a few months into, you know, me getting my first deck back in 2017, one of my friends invited me to go to an event with her. And it was, I thought it was just like a brunch gathering at one of her friend's homes, but I think it turned out to be like a beauty counter, like, sell makeup party, which isn't really important. But so I went there and she was like, oh, you should bring her tarot cards because, you know, some people there might want to reading. And I was like, sure. And in my mind, I was just kind of doing what I was always doing, or just bringing the cards with me. If friends or someone wanted to reading, or we wanted to bring the cards out, we would. But at this event, it was really interesting because it ended up kind of being my first foray into public readings. I got my cards out and the host of the event kind of announced that if anyone was interested in tarot, I would do readings. And then I kind of found a little corner space and set myself up. And then all of a sudden, everyone at the party just lined up for readings. And it was pretty wild. It turned into this very formal thing where I was sitting down and really getting practice and doing these formal readings for others. And at the end of the event, everyone kind of like pooled together and gave me some money for my time. And they were just because they were really grateful for the experience, not because I asked. And that was my kind of first ever paid tarot event. And it was completely unexpected. I was still so new to doing readings. But now as I kind of reflect back, I'm like, oh, wow, that really was kind of a seed planted into kind of where I'm at now. So fast forward a few years, you know, I've been doing tarot. I've gone on kind of like a pretty significant spiritual journey. Tarot is really integrated into my life. Like I do an annual spread for myself. I like go to the cards when I need guidance. I have friends who come to me. And then a couple of years ago, it was actually my sister's hairstylist. She was hosting an event at her salon, and she asked me if I wanted to do readings at the event. So I, you know, I thought it would be fun. I love doing tarot. I was a little bit nervous because this was kind of my first really paid event. And I had done tarot readings here and there for people where I charged them, but I had never really done like a big formal event where I'm like showing up as a tarot reader. And you know, that's like part of the main event. So this was a couple of years ago, and it was just such an interesting experience. So I didn't have anyone sign up in advance. I just kind of like set up a table, very similar to that event I went to back in like 2017. And you know, I offered 15 minute readings, and it was just kind of like whoever wanted one would just kind of show up and flow to me. And I was booked pretty much the whole evening. There were no like lulls, and it was really interesting to see who was kind of curious and who showed up. And there were some really amazing readings, and I just felt so excited and so full at the end of the experience, being able to kind of help people who were going through something or who weren't sure what was next. And I think that was like the first seed of like, oh, maybe there's something to this. Like I started to notice that like everyone who kind of came to me for guidance was in kind of like this, I don't know, I've let go of something and I'm not sure what's next. And that's kind of where the seeds of like the in-between season, the shoreline, all of this kind of came to be. But I didn't know it yet. And so then recently, through this hairstylist, she referred me to the owner of a jewelry store and kind of out of the blue, I got this text of like, hey, do you want to read Tarot at this event at a jewelry shop? And so I connected with the store owner. She was hosting kind of a witchy magical event where people could make little wish bottles. I was reading Tarot. She has a lot of like antique jewelry at her shop. So she was offering jewelry cleansings for anyone who wanted to take these vintage pieces and kind of like, you know, re-give them a reset and cleanse them. So it felt really aligned. I went to the event and I just had such an amazing experience again. I felt like the readings were really impactful. And for the first time, I felt really unattached to the outcomes, which I would say out of like all of the work that I do, Tarot is where I am the most attached. I feel like I'm really just channeling the messages of what people need to hear. And I'm just kind of like a vessel and I'm just reading the cards. And I don't read the cards in a very traditional way. I kind of, I use my intuition a lot. And the cards are really just kind of like the jumping off point and like the point of connection. But it's more of like an energy reading or an intuition reading and kind of more of like an untraditional blend, if you will. And this event was really special because I left just feeling very, not only very fulfilled, but just like I felt very trusting and like whatever happened happened, I'm not going to overanalyze and wonder if someone had a good experience, a bad experience. Did I say too much? Did I say too little? Was it what they wanted it to be? I was just like, this was a perfect moment in time. It happened and I'm happy about it and I'm moving on. And I think like that was such a powerful moment for me because as a chronic over thinker and someone who is kind of a people pleaser, I just felt like such progress to be like, I just have such a deep sense of trust in the other person, in the cards, in myself, and that was exactly what it needed to be, and nothing more, nothing less, and that's great. I also kind of left that event really being able to see the potential of how Tarot and coaching can work together. I think that especially doing the kind of shorter readings I was doing, where I often was just doing a past-present future spread, it's really helpful to be able to see like someone's story so quickly and see like, okay, this is where they've been, this is where they are now, and this is kind of where they're going. And I think like it creates this beautiful conversation point between me and the other person, and then we can kind of dive deeper into like, okay, like what kind of support are you looking for on your journey? And as an intuitive guide, I can kind of see like, okay, this is where they're going, and this is how I could potentially support them and relay that information. So I left also just feeling really reassured in my private coaching program and what I've kind of laid out and kind of starting with that clarity reading, that tarot reading. And I just feel like tarot and coaching just work so well together because you can just so quickly tap into not only your higher self, but like your journey and get that higher level perspective. So I really want to incorporate more of the tarot, I think, into my coaching beyond just the initial clarity reading. I think it is a super helpful way to kind of get yourself out of whatever it is you're going through. One of my friends always calls it, her mom says, you have to get out of your own soup sometimes. And it's just like, get out of your own stuff and get a new perspective. And I feel like tarot is a great way to kind of like, get out of your own soup, if you will, or kind of like, see your soup from a different perspective that maybe you hadn't seen it like that before. I also think it's a really great way to really connect with and strengthen your intuition. On my tarot journey, I think that is kind of when my intuition really started to speak to me more, or I was just like more open to it, and I started to build that pathway. And so I think it is like being able to draw the cards and like infuse your energy into the cards. It's a really great tactile, tangible way to see your intuition working. Yeah, I just think in general, it's a really lovely tool. There are so many beautiful tarot and oracle decks out there. I've collected many throughout the years. Even though I always come back to the same two decks, the primary deck I use is the Wild Unknown Tarot deck. So it's that creator's play or take on the traditional tarot cards. And then I also use that same creator's Animal Spirit deck. And I like to kind of blend the two in my readings. I think that can be really fun. But they're the only cards that I really allow other people to kind of handle and touch. I think it's important to have, to kind of set those boundaries for yourself, because any person who comes into contact with your cards is going to kind of infuse their energy into it. And so those two decks are the two that I use for public readings. And they've seen a lot of people, and I just feel like they have that energy of being public-facing, whereas some of my other decks are really just for me. I also have some that I will do readings for, like, close friends. But I think, like, each deck kind of has its own personality and its own desires, and I just feel very strongly that it's important to honor that. And that's not to say that, like, every deck is going to feel the same. I think it's, like, the relationship that you create with your cards, right? Like, there's nothing to say that, like, maybe if you got the Wild Unknown Tarot deck, like, that would be your deck that you kept just for yourself. But I think because mine was the first deck that I bought and I was so open with it from the beginning, that it has allowed me to be really open with it. And it's also just such a great kind of neutral deck. I love all of the messaging in it. I love the illustrations. I feel like it's a very approachable deck. But yeah, I think it's important to kind of just find what works for you, find a deck that speaks to you, and it can be just a really wonderful tool to build your intuition and to create that space to reflect on your journey, to dive deeper into yourself, and to learn more about who you are and where you might be going. It's such a great tool for self-growth, self-reflection. And I think pairing it with a journaling practice can be really beneficial as well. I just learned so much, not only about the cards, but about myself through drawing a card every day and then writing about it. So yeah, I think they go really well together, that tarot and kind of being on a growth path, whether it be coaching or journaling or connecting to your intuition. I think for me personally as well, I am such a curious person, and I love to get to know people on a deeper level and like what makes them tick, what they're going through. That kind of mindset really lends itself well to tarot, or tarot really lends itself well to me because it's a space where I can do that, and I feel really honored and really privileged that people show up and open up to me. I think that it's so special. Every reading is so unique and so special, and I feel really grateful every time I get to do one, whether it's for a friend or for a potential client or for a stranger, I just, it's so special and so sacred. So yeah, I hope to do more Tarot readings in the future. If you are curious about the Shoreline coaching program, I would invite you to book a clarity reading, and we can see what unfolds through the cards, and we can also talk about how the Shoreline can kind of support you as you navigate that journey. Even if you're not interested in coaching and you're curious about Tarot, book a reading anyway. There's no obligation. You don't have to move forward with coaching. It's just really, those clarity readings are really a way for me to be able to connect with you and see where you're at and maybe help you along your journey. So truly, if you're feeling called at all, if talking about Tarot really excited you in any way, I would encourage you to book a clarity reading with me. It's super fun. It's low stakes. And you just never know what might happen. So I will put the link in the show notes for where you can book, but you can always go to my website as well, www.kimkogani.com, and you'll find the information there as well. So that's everything I have for you today. Wherever you are, I hope that you take good care while the waves carry you closer. Your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Welcome to The Shoreline. I'm so happy to be back, sharing and podcasting, and whether you're new or you've been listening since the beginning, since the floating experiment days, I'm just so excited to have you. So thank you for listening. And today, I want to share a little bit more about how The Shoreline came to be. So we'll start, I guess, at the beginning of this year. I remember feeling really like kind of restless in my life, but excited for no immediate changes. And I remember wanting, it was January of this year, January of 2025, and I was really wanting to just kind of get out of my neighborhood, try something new. January in the Pacific Northwest can be kind of a slog. A lot of the days are just gray. The sun doesn't come out. It's rainy. Everyone's kind of staying inside. So I thought it would be fun to just kind of like go on a day trip. So I decided to go to Bainbridge Island, which is just a short ferry ride away from downtown Seattle. And it's a really fun way to just get out and to feel like you're traveling somewhere new without really going very far. And the ferries here are just so fun, so magical. Even just taking the ferry and like going there, coming back is really just quite an experience. So I went to Bainbridge. I was also kind of thinking in the back of my mind, like maybe this is somewhere I might want to explore living someday. Like, I'm happy, I was really happy where I was at, but I was kind of like also thinking about what was next. And I had started kind of making a dream wishlist of like the next place I wanted to live. And one of those like must have wishlist dream items was a view of the water. And I thought it would be maybe more easily attainable somewhere a little bit further out from Seattle and Bainbridge being an island. There's a lot more opportunity to kind of be on the shoreline. So I just wanted to explore it. I remember going and kind of immediately was like, oh no, like it's a really cute place, but not somewhere I really saw myself living. And at the end of the day, when I came home, I remember just feeling like, wow, I really love where I'm at. Like, I'm so grateful for this life I've cultivated for myself. I love my house. I love my routines. And like maybe things don't have to change. Maybe I don't have to think about what's next. And it really wasn't long after that where I was just like so happy to be home. I wanted to really just plant roots and ground where I was at, even more. It's that the townhouse I was living in was, it was the longest place in my adult life I had ever really lived. And that felt really special to me. So I was just like, okay, like this is, this is my sign that I meant to kind of just stay where I'm at. Well, very shortly after, maybe I want to say like a week or so after, I received a letter in the mail from my property management company that they had decided to sell all of the townhomes and I would have to move by the end of May. And that was just so shocking. It like really hit me like pretty deep, especially after the whole last year, all of 2024 was just like so chaotic with, you know, my cat passing away and then adopting a new cat who was pregnant and having ankle surgery, and then my dad going to the hospital. It was just like a lot. And, you know, coming home from Bainbridge felt like, okay, like I can finally like exhale. I'm okay where I'm at. I don't have to wait for the other shoe to drop, and I can just be. And then I get this letter that's like, well, nope, you're moving. And it just was really hard to process. And I had just never experienced that before. Every other place I had rented in my adult life, I got to choose when I left. It was always like, I love it here, but I'm ready for something new. And I would just flow into a new place. And it was always of my choosing. I've never had a landlord or a property management company tell me that I had to leave. So it just felt like almost like a violation of sorts. And I was pretty lost. So I had kind of like a breakdown. I shed some tears. And this is, as a side note, I am chronically on Zillow. I love looking at real estate. I always have, like, I remember being a kid. And my mom and I would just like go to open houses for fun. So that's always been kind of part of who I am. And so I kind of had an idea of what the rental market was like because I was always looking. And I started more seriously looking for myself. And it just felt like every place I was seeing, it felt like a downgrade. And every past move that I had done had been an upgrade from where I was. And I just really, I felt really defeated and really sad. And I was like, I don't want to give up this house. Every other townhouse in the neighborhood was a lot more money than I was paying. And it was not as great. And I felt really like it was important to find another new build. This was the first place that I had ever been the first person to live in it. And I loved that neutral energy feeling. And I was just really struggling with this idea of moving, even though I had already kind of been thinking about moving in the next year or two. So I remember kind of talking to my parents and being like, this, the market here is just atrocious. I don't know what I want to do. And my dad kind of floated the idea to me of like, well, what if you just like looked at what was for sale and you considered buying something? And I had never thought about it because I had never really saw myself being a homeowner in the first place. I had never thought I would commit to a place long enough. And it always had felt like it would be really restrictive and limiting. But when my dad kind of floated the idea to me, I felt myself kind of like relaxed. And I really started to see like, I think I'm done. I think I'm done renting. Like I don't want someone else to decide how long I get to live somewhere. I don't want to renegotiate a lease every year and to kind of think in this year-to-year way. Like I really want to settle in and build my life and this next chapter for myself. So I started to kind of just look around. I really felt strongly that I wanted to stay in relatively the same area. I really love my neighborhood. I love the connections I've built. I love the access to nature, and it's really close to the water. And, yeah, I just really wanted to stay where I was at. And I also really wanted to find a yard for Cauchy, I think, at the same time. Like she, her and I were kind of done with the, like, having to, like, leash up and go outside multiple times a day, like, for bathroom breaks for her. And I just wanted a little bit more ease in my life. So a couple days after I received that letter, I ended up going to an open house. And immediately when I walked in, I just felt so at peace. It was nothing really that was on my wish list. Like, I said that I wanted a new build. This house is 100 years old. But it did have a water view, and it was in the same neighborhood. And yeah, just immediately when I walked in, I was like, I just feel so at peace. It feels really cozy. And it just felt like this was where I was meant to be. So I think it was a Thursday in January that I received the letter that I had to move. I went to the open house on Saturday. And then the following Tuesday, I put in an offer, and it was accepted, which felt super scary, but also very exciting. And then a week later, that next Tuesday, my dad died. And that day was just a crazy day. And I think that'll have to be a story for another time, just talking about what happened and the grief, because that, it really just changed me completely. But the timeline of how everything happened was so quick. And during that time, I had to kind of decide, like, do I still move? Moving in a time of like such deep grief felt very hard, but at the same time, like, I had to move no matter what, and I had found this home that felt so aligned and so perfect. So I went through with the home purchase. I was up in Alaska for most of the closing, and I felt pretty detached from the entire process. I wasn't even, you know, in the same, wasn't in Seattle for most of the closing process. I was up in Alaska, kind of working through putting together my dad's service, being there for my mom, like going through the grieving process. So it was really strange to come back to Seattle after being gone, after having gone through this very intense experience. And I remember coming back to my townhouse, and I just felt terrible. I mean, I felt terrible because I was going through something terrible, but it just didn't feel like a home anymore. And I just started to feel like I was in this freefall of like everything just felt so off, like this place that had been such a sanctuary to me just didn't feel that way anymore, partially because I was so deep in grief and just trying to process losing this really important person in my life. But also going back to that letter, I felt like that sense of security had been taken away from me the moment that they told me that I had to leave. And it almost felt like I had done something wrong even though I hadn't. And what was really crazy about receiving that letter is, I had already received my lease for the next year, and I was getting ready to send it back to them signed, and then to kind of receive that letter saying, I had to leave before I could get the lease back. It just felt like, well, what if I had not taken as much time? Or I was just kind of questioning everything, and I had to pack up and move, and probably the most difficult thing that I've ever been through. But I moved, and I made it into my new house, and that was also just so uncomfortable, like, moving into this new phase. I felt like I hadn't yet had the time to grow into the version of myself that fit living in this home, that fit kind of moving into owning something versus renting. And so, for the first few months, I was really questioning my decision, and just wondering, like, had I made a mistake? Like, everything just felt really... I just felt really raw and vulnerable, and I had nothing to hold onto. I had let go of this place that really felt like home, and that really healed me. I was still in the same area, but I had moved a little bit further out to the point where, like, all of my routines were different. Like, I wasn't just down the street from my coffee shop anymore. It was a little bit longer of a walk. And so, it just felt like so much was different. There was nothing to hold onto, and I had no choice but to really just, like, move through the grief, move through not only the grief of losing such an important person, but also, like, the grief of, like, losing who I once was. Like, my dad dying is such a distinct before and after in my life. And that, I think, is something that's not talked about a lot in grief. And maybe I'll get into that in the future. But there was just a lot happening of, like, just so much grief, so much loss, loss of identity, like, loss of a parent, loss of a sense of security. Like, I was just, like, really going through it. And I had to just kind of, like, let myself. Those first few months were really tough. Like, it really just took everything I had to even, like, get out of bed in the morning. And I just felt like I was going through the motions of life. And I was in a space that didn't really feel like mine yet. I didn't feel like I was ready to take any of this on. Not that you ever are, but I just felt like, oh, this felt like I, like, maybe if I had a couple more years, that maybe I could have been more prepared or something. And it was just really, really challenging. And I knew that I needed support. And so I kind of explored some different avenues of, like, what that could look like and kind of leaning on the different tools I had cultivated over the years. But I felt really called to start working with a leadership coach. And there was someone who I have known for, like, a few years now, and I had actually done a discovery call with her a few years ago, and it didn't work out for us to work together the first time. But I decided to reach out to her on Instagram. She had posted that she was taking new clients. And so I just sent her a message, and I was like, hey, I know we already did a discovery call, but I'm in a completely different place in life, and I want to explore working together again. So I booked a call with her, and we just talked through where I was at, how she could support me. And I just felt like in that call, she so clearly could see who I was becoming and how grief can be this really magical, powerful portal of transformation. And it was right after that discovery call that I took action on developing The Shoreline. I was like, okay, I'm ready to be in service again, maybe go back to work. And I wrote down everything that would be part of like my dream coaching container. And once I did that, I quickly realized like, I think I'm too close to this work, that I need to call in more support. And so I asked my friend Caitlin, who is such a, just a wonderful person, who like really sees and understands me and my work. And she's such a dear friend, but she's also just so magical with words. She's a great wordsmith, and we've worked together in the past. And I knew that like, if I couldn't write this for myself, like she's the person I would want to put this together. So I asked her to do some copywriting for the sales page of my coaching program. And what she gave back to me was just beyond what I was expecting. It was such a gift. And she really put words to everything that I had been thinking about and trying to create. And that's really where The Shoreline was born. And as I kind of went through the process of like marketing and deciding like how I want to like birth this into the world, I started to think about like, really, I think that The Shoreline is... is something bigger than just one-on-one coaching sessions. Like, it really feels like a calling of sorts for me to... to share these in-between seasons of life. Like, I'm... I've grown and changed so much, and I've experienced so much in my life so far. And it's really through these liminal spaces that I... I have learned the most. And I think that it's something that really is just such... It's such a rich time, and there's so much opportunity there that I really want to shed light on... on the in-between seasons of life and what happens when you let go of something that you know is no longer for you without truly knowing what's coming next. And that's... that's a tricky place to be, and that's really what The Shoreline is all about. You know, this podcast has been through a few iterations. We started with The Floating Experiment, where I kind of was like learning to be in flow, connecting back to my intuition. It evolved into The Kim Kogane Show, which was really just exploring more of like a journal style podcast. And here we are now. We're at The Shoreline. I'm still navigating my transition, my in-between space. I'm exploring what is life like with no certainty, which I think is such a huge theme that comes from grieving, where you're like, nothing is certain. We don't know how much time we have left. And I just really want to explore all aspects of transition and in-betweens, whether you're also grieving the loss of a loved one, or maybe you're leaving a career, or you're ending a significant relationship, or you're just shedding an old identity. Like, whatever it is, we're all going to experience this in-between at some point in our lives. And so, yeah, my goal here is really just to share with you, like, what I'm going through, and to explore these different themes. And I hope that you'll continue to listen and follow along. And yeah, maybe it inspires you to kind of look at where you're at in your life, and if you're in an in-between season. So that leads me to kind of what am I doing now? I have my Shoreline offering, which is a private coaching container. So I'm offering one-on-one coaching sessions for people creating. My hope is to create a space for clients to explore, and I'm really going to lead with my intuition. And the goal is for it to be a container that's completely tailored for you. I think in a lot of coaching, it can be like applying the person to the modality. Like you go to a coach for a specific type of training, and as someone who is multi-passionate, I've collected a lot of experiences, I've done a lot of trainings, and I want to fit the modalities to the person, not the other way around. So in this coaching container, it's completely tailored to you and what you're going through. It's a very intuitive approach. I bring in my somatic training, and it's really just a space for you to pause and kind of reflect weekly on where you've been, where you are, and where you're going. So if that's something that's of interest to you, if you're looking for one-on-one support, you can go to my website to learn more about The Shoreline coaching container, and I offer clarity tarot readings as kind of the discovery call. So if you're feeling called just to even see what's next for you, you can book one of those. It's completely free, and I would love to connect with you. So I will leave all of that information in the show notes, and I look forward to going on this journey with you. So thank you so much for listening. I hope that you take good care while the waves carry you closer, and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

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  Welcome to The Shoreline, where we explore the tender in-between seasons of the human experience. My name is Kim, and I'm here to support you as you navigate your next becoming. Here, we don't fix, we listen. We don't rush, we allow. Welcome to today's episode. I unexpectedly took a break from podcasting for a couple of weeks, but I'm so happy to be back, and I'm really glad that you're here. Today, I want to share something that's really personal to me, that it's something that I keep pretty close to me. And if you know me personally, you might know this about me. And if you don't, then you might have no idea. But I promise it'll all make sense when I share. So let's go ahead and get into it. But what I want to share with you kind of has to do with what I've been up to the last few weeks. So about mid-January, my mom came to visit, and she stayed through the beginning of February to celebrate the one-year anniversary of my dad's passing. Right after that, my mom flew home, and my sister and I went on a trip. And then I came back and got sick. And here we are. Now I'm feeling better. I'm recording and just happy to be here with you. So what I want to share with you today is an interesting kind of revelation I had about myself. So if you know me personally, you already know this about me, but I am a pretty big American football fan. So my family has watched the Seattle Seahawks for a long time. My dad was a season ticket holder pretty much from the beginning, and it's something that helped me feel really connected with him when he was alive, and it's something that helps me feel really connected to him now that he's gone. So I originally got into watching football, because I wanted to kind of have something to talk to my dad about, and I wanted to feel closer to him, and I started going to games with him back in, I want to say 2010 or 2011, and over the years, it's something that just has become my own interest, and not just something that I kind of did for my dad. When I moved to Seattle in 2014, it was one of the big things that helped me feel like I belonged, or that I, that Seattle was home for me. I think there was just this really amazing feeling that I had every time I would go to the stadium, and it was this automatic connection point. Like, I could see strangers wearing jerseys, wearing Seahawks gear, and immediately feel connected, and feel like, oh my gosh, like, I enjoy that, too, and it helped me feel rooted in a brand new city. It's also something that really has brought our family together. We would go to a couple of games as a family, and it just became this kind of almost ritual for us to do together, and it was a really nice way, and like a reason for my parents to visit, and yeah, it just became kind of this really core part of our identity as a family. I have so many great memories of going to games with my family, celebrating when our team won, and it's just been something that's really positive in my life. And when my dad passed away last year, I wasn't really sure how I was going to feel and how I would move forward once football season kind of came around. And when football season started, it had been about seven months since my dad passed, and I was still pretty deep in grief, and I knew that it was going to be really emotional to go back to the stadium for the first time, to kind of watch the Seahawks. And I just, I wasn't really sure how it was going to go, but I knew that I needed to take that difficult step forward. So for the first home game of the season, my mom came to visit, and we went as a family, and I really didn't watch much of the game. I was pretty emotional. There were a lot of tears, and it felt like there were just all these reminders everywhere of these experiences I had with my dad, of his presence and his influence in my life. And it was really difficult. But as the season progressed, the constant reminders, the feeling of his presence, that energy became less something that triggered an emotional response and more something that felt really comforting. And in this first season without my dad, the team itself, the Seahawks weren't really expected to do much. There's, we have a new coach. It was kind of, the expectation was that it would be like more of a building year. But as the season progressed, they started winning and, you know, overcoming challenges, and it became like more and more exciting. So then when the regular season ended, and they went to the playoffs, there were more games to go to. We got to go to two playoff games here in Seattle, and that's partially why my mom came down to visit. And we got to go to those games and just create new memories and honor kind of this gift that my dad gave us of like this, something that just will always bring us together. And something that always keeps us connected. And I remember that first playoff game, one of the ushers in the section that my dad's seats were in. She came up to my mom and myself, and she, at the beginning of the season, we had made little stickers with my dad's face on it. And she flipped her badge around and showed us like the sticker we had given her. And she was like, your dad has been here, you know, with us all season. And it just felt so impactful to have this person that I don't really know, but I've seen before at games, like kind of express the impact that my dad had on her life just by showing up and doing something that he enjoyed. And what was really interesting is that as the stakes became higher, as the team advanced through the playoffs, I could just feel more and more of my dad's presence. It felt like there was going to be this beautiful full circle moment, and then the Seahawks won the NFC Championship, which meant that they were going to the Super Bowl. And by chance, we, my family, kind of got the opportunity to purchase tickets to go to the Super Bowl, and my sister and I got to actually go to the Super Bowl and watch the Seahawks win in person. And it just felt like the most magical gift from my dad. Like, I just felt his presence so deeply. And the Super Bowl actually took place, like, four days after the anniversary of his passing. And it just felt like this beautiful gift of, like, I don't want you to be sad. I want you to feel joy as you move forward and to know I'm always with you. And on the actual anniversary of my dad's passing, my mom and my sister and I gathered together, and we just had, like, a moment to ourselves. And in that moment, I silently just asked my dad, like, hey, I love when you send me signs. Like, keep sending me signs, like, aligned numbers, like animals, whatever it is, just keep letting me know that you are around. And I saw so many signs leading up to my trip to the Super Bowl, and so many signs on that trip. I actually started just keeping a list on my phone because it was so wild. I saw aligned numbers everywhere. Like, I usually see a lot of aligned numbers just in general because I kind of like to look for them, but they were just like everywhere and so obvious. And it was just the most positive, joyful, emotionally cathartic experience. And it just felt like this really important milestone that the Seahawks won and this beautiful celebration of moving forward and carrying this grief of losing my dad in a new way. And yeah, it was just a really beautiful experience. So there's that kind of the grief portion and the closing of this transitional chapter of the year of firsts, of the first time doing all these things without this really important person present. And the other side of this is I realized after I got back from the Super Bowl trip, I realized something about myself. As I've mentioned before, I'm working with a leadership coach to help me kind of step into this next phase of my life and to help me really grow and evolve into the leader and the person I want to become. And we've been talking a lot about like energy and essence and these inherent qualities that each kind of unique individual possesses. And I realized that I am the purest person and the purest, highest version of myself when I'm a Seahawks fan. And this is just something that's actually like really unexpected for me. I never thought that like intuition work and kind of like woo-woo energetics would really ever go together with like American football and the NFL. But for me, it does. And that's when I'm in my most aligned energy. I'm really open to receiving signs. I'm like connecting with loved ones who are no longer in the physical realm. I feel overflowing with joy. I'm a lot more open to connection and connecting with strangers. And I just feel really, really light. And like the most embodied version of myself. And once I realized that, at first I kind of had to like pause and be like, is that true? Like being an NFL football fan is what brings me into like my most aligned energy. Like that's not the story that I would have written for myself, but it's something that really holds true for me. And what's most interesting is that my kind of dedication and my passion for watching football and supporting the Seahawks has only grown since losing my dad. I thought that maybe there was a chance I would like disengage or become disinterested, but my passion has only grown stronger. And I've been trying to find more ways to feel joy and connect. At the end of last season, my sister and I started making bracelets in team colors with players' names and sayings and handing them out at games. And it's this really beautiful way to connect with people and a really amazing way to spread unexpected joy, to see someone's excitement and delight and surprise when we offer something that we've made with our hands is just such a special feeling. It just makes me so happy. And yeah, I don't really know quite how to express it, but I just feel like there's something that there's just something about feeling united to support a common thing, whether it's a sports team or a cause or a community project, whatever it is, it's so important to find that connection and to find those arenas where we can feel the most ourselves and like the best version of ourselves. And I think the lesson here really is that it can happen in the most unexpected ways. And sometimes our mind likes to kind of create a very narrow path for us. And if you can open yourself up, you might actually already have what it is you're looking for. I always thought that being spiritual, being intuitive had to look a very specific way. It looked like long meditations and, you know, being out in nature and doing yoga and kind of these very cliché practices. And while that may be true for others, for me, it looks a little bit different, and that's okay. I still love being out in nature and journaling and being in the quiet. That's a really beautiful way for me to turn inward and connect to my own wisdom and connect to my intuition. And it's available to me in other ways as well, and in really unexpected ways, at a loud, noisy stadium with crazy, like, sports fanatics. That's not how I really saw it, but that's how it is. And that's actually pretty cool. And I think it also shows that our stories are all so unique, and it's important to let life surprise us a little. I think having a guiding light, having a North Star, having your values and commitments and goals are really important. And leave room to let the universe fill in the blanks a little bit for you. And these very human things can also bring us deeper connection to our spirituality or to our wisdom or to the universe. It all works together. So there you have it. I'm admitting to you that I watch football, and I'm super passionate about it, and I'm a huge Seahawks fan. I get pretty loud at games, which is something that really surprised me about myself. I just didn't imagine that ever being part of my personality, but it is. And it's really cool to have this team, this thing that I can hold on to, that brings me so close to my dad. And also, it just feels really special that the team is doing well, and they won the Super Bowl, and that this first season without my dad was so exciting and surprising and delightful. It felt like this is the best case scenario, right? Like there is something to celebrate and to honor him. And to be honest, I was really sad when the season finally came to a close, and all of the celebrations kind of were winding down. And I was like, I don't know what, where do we go from here? It's a long time until the season starts again. But I think that the timing is really good. It gives me space to digest and process and reflect. And then we get to do it all over again. So that's kind of what I've been up to on a personal level. And I just wanted to kind of come here and share with you and it feels a little scary to reveal more of the personal details. But I'm hoping that it lands well with you and that you're interested in what I'm sharing. And I'm excited to be back in this space and to keep creating and sharing with you. And yeah, that's what I have to share today. And before we close, I do have a request. My request is that, if you enjoy listening to this podcast, could you share your favorite episode with someone you know who might also enjoy it? This does two things. It really creates an opportunity for connection. You know, like what I said before, like it's a really great thing to be able to connect through a common theme or interest. So sharing an episode that you enjoy might foster an unexpected connection for you. And, you know, if everyone who's listening shares it with just one person who they know and they start listening, that doubles the reach, doubles the audience, you know, starts to really build this community and this space, which I think would be really lovely. So that's my request. If you are enjoying listening, sharing one episode that you particularly enjoyed with someone in your life who might also enjoy it. And if you're feeling stuck in the foggy middle or exhausted from having to always figure it out alone, know that I am always here for you. You can always book a clarity reading with me. And if you listen to the last episode where I did kind of a general clarity tarot spread on here, then you'll get like a better idea of what that clarity reading might look like for you. So if you want more information about that, or you want to schedule a time to meet with me, you can go to my website, www.kimkogani.com. And that's all I have for you today. I hope you take good care while the waves carry you closer, and know that your next version is already waiting on the shore.

If you’re feeling stuck in the foggy middle and exhausted from having to always “figure it out” alone, I want to invite you to…

Connect to your north star using my FREE Intention Setting Worksheet to find more clarity and purpose in your life

Explore The Shoreline Private Sessions to find aligned support as you navigate a significance life transition

Read this blog for tips on how invite more magic into your everyday and receive signs from the nonphysical

Kim Kogane is a writer and intuitive guide helping you navigate the tender in-between seasons. She lives in a 1930s brick tudor home in the Pacific Northwest with her dog, Cauchy, and three cats. Learn more about Kim.

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